


Heaven Is a Place on Earth

by w_space



Category: Doctor Strange (2016), Iron Man (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Black Mirror: San Junipero episode inspired - w/ liberal changes to fit Tony-Stephen-&MCU, Bottom Tony Stark, Falling In Love, First Time, Insecurity, M/M, Other, Past Pepper Potts/Tony Stark, Pining, Sexual Tension, Smut, Steve is a good friend, Tony was still Iron Man, Top Stephen Strange, Very brief Stony, but if you are interested in the ep you should def watch its great, don't worry Tony and Stephen don't "die" die, how to explain, no need to know/watch the episode to understand - i basically tried to cover everything, talks of death/afterlife/euthanasia
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-02-03
Updated: 2020-07-30
Packaged: 2021-02-28 05:02:32
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 24,863
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22828381
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/w_space/pseuds/w_space
Summary: San Junipero is a simulated reality where the deceased can live in after they have passed and the elderly can visit for a certain amount of hours a week. All inhabitants are able to exist there in their younger bodies and in any decade of their choosing. Their consciousness is “uploaded” into this world where they can function freely in ways their bodies perhaps may not allow them to in the physical world.For Stephen, this was his only chance of living any life at all. A chance to fall in love. For Tony, it was supposed to have just been a passing amusement before the end. He wasn’t supposed to have fallen in love.(Couldn’t get rid of San Junipero episode of Black Mirror out my head but as IronStrange... and if you think I'll take Iron Man away from Tony, you're dead wrong.)
Relationships: Tony Stark/Stephen Strange
Comments: 69
Kudos: 169





	1. Part I

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ahahahahahaa... re-posted;;;  
> I deleted it last time because... well, to simply put, after couple hours didn’t know how I felt about this one-  
> ...but let's try this again;;;
> 
> **BTW because people kept asking: you do not need to watch the episode or know black mirror to understand this fic - I basically just covered the important parts. BUT if you are interested in the episode you should def go watch. It's great.**

_San Junipero  
_ _simulation year: 1987_

Stephen strode down the still busy street. Passing the movie theater that lightened up a good section of the block, the nightclubs and bars that seemed packed, the crowds of chattering friends, couples, who still lingered the late night. He tried to keep it subtle but his eyes darted around constantly, his mind overrun with new information left and right.

Once or twice, his sights lingered on his own reflection in the shop windows, amusing briefly whether he liked this look. Clean-shaven, his hair waving in some areas. Even with silver streaks at his temple, he looked rather young. Possibly in his mid-late 20s, early 30s if he was stretching it.

Like everyone else in this town.

A car slowed to a stop near him. One of those top-down convertibles that you couldn’t help but hear the loudness of the radio being played.

♪ _Ooh baby do you know what’s worth? Ooh heaven is a place on earth~_ ♫

_“Belinda Carlisle there with one of the biggest hits of 1987 so far-“_

Stephen watched for a moment as one of the passengers stepped out but soon continued walking. Behind him, he vaguely heard the exchanges of goodbyes followed by the roaring of the engine as the car drove off.

A block, then two.

“Could you please stop! I just want to have some fun, okay?”

“Tony-… Tony! Come on!”

His head unconsciously turned. From a distance, Stephen saw two new figures crossing the street to where he stood. The one in front, shorter, brunette male, was walking at a swift pace.

He was eye-catching, attractive. Even from a distance, Stephen’s attention fixated on those large doe eyes and long, dark lashes… clean face, tanned-skin, strong jaws, full lips, tasseled hair…

“Tony!” A taller, broader blonde followed closely behind.

“I’m still walking, Steve!”

Neither of the pair paid Stephen much heed. They stopped not far from him, only a couple yards away. Or more like the blonde managed to get a hold of the other’s forearm finally.

“We only got a couple of hours, you know? So let’s use it.”

“I am using it!” With that, Tony managed to pull away, flashing a mocking smirk before sprinting quickly into the large double door to the left.

Steve followed with a huff.

Stephen paused. He regarded the door, then turned his gaze upward to the neon sign. _Avengers,_ it said.

* * *

The place ended up being a nightclub of some sort. Dimmed lights with glowing neon colors, loud, lively music many were dancing to. A large bar stood at the far end, stretching from one wall to the other. The dance floor made up most of the center with many booths and standing tables along the outer edge.

And to the right of the entrance, an arcade.

Stephen doesn’t see the pair he eavesdropped on just outside. But considering the number of people partying inside, he’s not surprised.

He slowly made his way towards the game machines, taking his time to look through each one before his gaze fell onto a familiar logo. Stephen reached into his pocket, almost surprised to magically find quarters there.

* * *

“Hey… You’re good at this.”

Stephen didn’t turn, only darting his gaze momentarily, ever so slightly, to the new presence to his right.

“Thanks,” he said, eyes back onto the screen again. “I’ve played it before.”

“It’s got different endings depending on if you’re in one or two-player.”

“Uh-huh…” It was barely audible, a half-hearted reply.

“Kind of the first game to do that-“

“Dammit!” Stephen exclaimed as he slammed a hand to the control surface. The familiar _Game Over_ flashed mockingly.

But with that, he shifted his attention fully to the stranger. The man had short, dark hair, average height and build. Faintly nerdy with the glasses he was wearing but had on a good-natured smile. He held a drink in hand that had a straw... with a hint of uneasiness.

“I’m Scott. Scott Lang,” the other said.

“Stephen.”

There was an awkward pause only filled by the background musics of the games that surrounded them. Scott's gaze shifted to here and there but Stephen simply regarded him with a blank expression.

Eventually, Scott cleared his throat, “Oh… do-… do you want to try Top Speed?“ he nodded towards another arcade machine.

Stephen turned towards it, watching the screen. It appeared to be a racing game. A red car roaring along the highway before it spins out of control, hitting a building.

He flinched back, “Uh… no.” He swallowed, trying to regain his composure. “No. …Thank you. Sorry. I… I sort of just want to get my bearings.”

Without really waiting for a response, he sharply turned, walking off.

“Uh- okay!” Scott called out after him, “See you around!”

* * *

Instead of walking out, Stephen somehow found himself wandering further in. He now sat at a booth a good distance away from the dance floor, a glass of coke in hand. Just coke. The bartender had given him an odd look when he asked.

He peered amongst the crowd, checking out the comings and goings. There were many young couples, preening jocks, gatherings of friends that chatted excitedly.

Then suddenly, Stephen’s sights fell on a familiar brunette.

Tony hurried past him. Although, soon, coming to an abrupt halt. Stephen frowned slightly as the shorter male did a quick 180, turning to his direction. Before he can utter a word, Tony sat beside him.

“Go along with whatever I say.”

Stephen blinked, meeting the honeyed gaze that seemed to be almost pleading. “Excuse me?” he manages after a short silence.

“Whatever I say,” Tony replied, “go along with it.”

He doesn’t get a chance to question it. The next second, the other half of the pair joined them.

Steve opened his mouth but Tony was quicker.

“Seriously, Steve? You’re just pestering now. Do I have to red light you?”

The blonde let out a sigh, checking his watch. “Two hours and thirty-five. There’s not much time left-“

Tony gave a dramatic ugh. “Steve-…”

“Last week, we had the most amazing-“

“Last week was last week,” Tony snapped. Then he nodded towards Stephen’s direction, draping an arm around the other comfortably. “I need to talk to my friend here, okay? Haven’t seen him in a while.”

Steve gave Tony an exasperated look.

“We haven’t met,” Stephen said leaning forward a little and extending a hand. “Stephen.”

The blonde’s expression changed as the baby blue eyes landed on the other. He gave Stephen a polite smile, taking the hand in a firm handshake. “Steve.”

“Steve,” Tony continued swiftly, tone turning serious. “Stephen is sick. Like six months to live sick.”

“Five actually,” Stephen blurts out.

Tony side-eyed him.

Stephen definitely makes out the momentary amusement behind the dark gaze. …Certainly notices just how beautiful the other is up this close. He can practically count all the long lashes, trace the straight nose bridge, memorize the twitch of the lips as it curls at the corner into a playful smile… Tony looks almost like a doll. Too perfect.

He briefly wondered if this was his real look or somehow an altered version for San Junipero.

But in seconds, Tony’s sights turned back to Steve. “I need to catch up with him. _Please_.”

Steve, for a moment, appeared as if to argue further. However, another look back and forth, seemed to have decided better of it.

“Okay,” he said relenting. “Okay…”

Then he turned to Stephen, “Hey, I’m sorry… for… you know-”

Stephen shrugged. “That’s alright. Better than most here I’m sure.”

Steve gave him a sympathetic smile.

They watch him go in silence. And eventually, Tony removed his arm, giving the other his personal space back.

But Stephen found he misses the warmth.

“Sorry for killing you,” Tony said with a smile. “You know… The whole six months to live thing. Sorry- ...five.” There was a fondness in that tone. Warm and bright. “Five was a nice touch.”

Stephen let out a low chuckle. “Glad I was of some help.”

The corner of the brunette’s lips twitch. He gestured to the direction Steve had gone. “He’s not a bad guy. Just saying. I kind of feel bad actually. He’s really not… bad. Just idealistic. …Met him at Sakaar and-…”

“What’s a Sakaar?”

Tony regarded him for a second as if considering. “…If you don’t already know what Sakaar is, you probably don’t want to know.” Then he lowered his voice, the tone taking a much suggestive turn. “…Or maybe you do. Always the composed, quiet ones that end up being more… adventurous.”

Stephen blinked. Not sure how to respond to that.

But unlike his previous run-ins, Tony seemed to not mind the silence at all. Too confident to let it bother him. He made it seem intentional, deliberate. Comfortably leaning back, his head gently leaning to one side, supported by a hand, eyes never leaving Stephen.

“What are you doing?” he finally manages.

Tony gave a light shrug, “I’m… regarding you.”

“Feels like I’m being analyzed.”

“Want a sip?” The brunette held out his drink. “Come on~ Can’t be satisfied with just that-“ He nudged towards the near-empty coke glass.

Stephen took it, lifting the glass to his lips. Although right away, he wished he hadn’t. The next second, he was coughing into his fist.

Tony raised an eyebrow. “Never tasted it before?” He sounded incredulous.

“No. …I… just… haven’t had it in awhile. It’s good.” He handed back the overly strong cocktail.

“Do you live here?”

“No… but-“

“A tourist?”

Stephen opened then closed his mouth, no words.

“We’ll go with tourist. So you’re new here? …I’d bet. Because I definitely would have remembered those pretty eyes and cheekbones if we met-“

“First night.”

“First night!” Tony let out a hearty laugh. “Well! Okay then. We should find a way to make it memorable! Can’t have you be running around saying I was boring-“

Stephen let out a soft laugh under his breath, shaking his head slightly.

It felt like he could barely keep up with the other. Tony was vibrant. More vibrant than the colorful flashing lights that lit up this darkened room. More intense than the loud, upbeat music that shook the grounds. Lively, expressive, bright in a way that Stephen never knew was even possible. Someone who truly set the mood, influenced the very air around them.

Stephen desperately wanted to say something. Something that was witty and clever. A line that would make himself seem as interesting as he finds Tony.

But before he settled on the words, the music changed.

Stephen doesn’t recognize it but clearly Tony had.

“Oh my god! HA!” He threw his head back in an enthusiastic laugh. “We HAVE to dance to this!”

Tony quickly downed the rest of his drink in one gulp that had Stephen wincing. Then, quickly hopped to his feet, nearly dragging the other with him.

“With each other?” he stammered hastily.

“Uh-huh!”

Stephen tried to tug back a little but found Tony to be much stronger than he looked. “Dancing is not my thing-“

When they reach the center of the dance floor, Tony spun around with a huge grin. “Ah- let’s not limit ourselves!”

“I-…” But Stephen’s voice faltered as the other took his hand.

The song reached the chorus with full swing. People were laughing all around them, moving to the beat uninhibited. And Tony as well was dancing. Not just moving but really _dancing_. Swinging to the rhythm in smooth movements that has Stephen simply staring.

Taking pity, Tony leaned in. “Copy me!” he shouted over the loud tune.

He slowed down to a degree. Nothing elaborate, performing simpler dance moves while nudging for Stephen to follow suit.

And he does. Or tries to. First hesitantly but slowly finding a good pace. Tony shows another move. Stephen copied it. And another, and another… It helped that Tony smiles at him, all too pleased and encouraging.

“See! You got it!” Tony went back to moving faster, spinning around his taller partner while touching the shoulder or arm here and there.

A smile found its way onto Stephen’s lips as he cautiously gave into the enjoyment.

Another minute and Tony’s hand are on him again, their bodies flushed, face close…

His brain short-circuits.

Suddenly, he couldn’t hear the music, couldn’t see the many faces of the crowd all around them. He traced the other’s lips with his eyes, noting every detail, every twitch... the tip of the pink tongue that darted out. Couldn’t stop the shaky inhale as Tony’s hip grind up against him.

Then everything came back in a rush.

People were staring. Smiling, appreciative… perhaps not in any malicious way but they were _staring_.

Stephen pulled away sharply. Turning around and rushing away from the stage, away from the attention, out the door.

* * *

“Hey! Hey-“

Stephen looked up, watching as the back door shut behind Tony.

They were the only two in the dark alleyway, the only sound coming from the building they had just left, the muffled beat of the next song.

“What happened back there?” It sounded more concerned than accusing.

“I… I said I was not much of a dancer.”

“No shit,” came the teasing retort. But realizing the other’s expression, the smirk faltered. “…Okay, look… Sorry I pushed you into it. Saturday night is only once a week, you know? It’s like… no time and I get impatient.”

Stephen quickly shook his head. “It’s not that,” he cuts in. “…it’s… everyone was _staring_.”

Tony blinked, fast. “Staring…?”

“You know… two guys… dancing… together…“

It seemed to take a moment for Tony to wrap his head around the idea. “Okay. One, folks are _way_ less uptight than they used to be,” he said with a sympathetic smile. “And two, this is a party town, no one is _judging_ -“

But Stephen continued to stare at him, expression unchanging.

“And face it,” Tony went on swiftly. He stepped a little closer, the trademark smirk now fully plastered onto his face. “If they _were_ staring, it’s because _I_ give them a lot to stare at.”

He snorted out a laugh. “Yes, of course,” he replied sarcastically.

“Oh come on, are you going to tell me you _don’t_ like staring at me?”

“I…” Stephen swallowed. “I… do.”

There was a pause. And there was that same analyzing gaze.

“What?”

Tony gave him a look over, up and down. “Just… you are not what I expected.”

“What were you expecting?”

“You’re pretty.”

“…Excuse me?”

“You’re pretty,” Tony repeats flatly, very matter-of-fact. He was completely unabashed, still ever brazen in tone. “You’re quite a looker. Like _way_ above average pretty. And you carry yourself well. You have a presence. Can also definitely tell you’re smart in the little things you do. I thought you would have gotten around. You know, like me? Partied hard and lived life to the fullest?”

Stephen blinked, it felt like he no longer understood where their conversation was heading.

“But… you’re so… _fresh_. It like… you’re completely new to this. Not like… _just-new-to-San Junipero_ new but new to… well, everything. Did you never do any of this before?”

“…I’ve never been on a dance floor.”

“Never? As in whole time you’ve been alive never?”

“Never.”

Another silence. And Stephen turned his gaze to the far wall, not really being sure if he wanted to meet the other’s gaze.

“What are you? Like Amish? That’s one sheltered existence you got there.”

He huffed, rolling his eyes. “Nebraska.”

“What?”

“I grew up in Nebraska. There wasn’t much of… This type of lifestyle wasn’t much of an option.”

It wasn’t a lie he supposed.

“Oh… oh, okay.” Tony paced a little in place, eyes still not leaving the taller male. “Well… what would you like to do now? Is there anything you want to do that you’ve never got to do before?”

Stephen smiled, more to himself. “Ah well… so many things…”

But then he felt warmth. Tony stood close once more, enough to be sharing the same air, feeling each other’s heat.

“As I said, San Junipero is a party town,” the tone was low, playful. “All up for grabs. Midnight is two hours away…”

Stephen tried to slow his breathing, trying to calm his nerves, the excitement. For the millionth time tonight, it felt like his heart was going to stop. “…That’s… not that long…”

“So why waste time standing here?” Tony fingered the collar of Stephen’s shirt, tugging just enough for the other to feel it without being pulled.

He wanted to lean in. He was already leaning in. He wanted…

Stephen took a step back, abruptly enough for Tony to flinch. He doesn’t miss the look of surprise in those large doe eyes. It tugged at him in ways he couldn’t fully comprehend.

“I… uh… I… listen-“

But Tony appeared to have recovered faster. “It’s okay,” he said simply.

“No, I mean-“

“It’s really okay,” Tony let out a soft laugh.

“Look, I… ah-…”

“Hey really, it’s all good. Sorry. I… I thought…”

“No, it’s not-“

“If I didn’t read the mood right and made you uncomfortable-“

“ _I’m engaged_.”

That shut Tony up in an instant. They both stared at one another completely still.

“You’re… engaged?”

“Yes. Engaged. I have a fiancé.”

“At your age?”

Stephen lifted his hands up a little before letting them fall back to his sides. “Yes. I know.”

But Tony was smiling now, almost amused by Stephen’s flustering.

“She’s… she’s a nice girl-… woman! She’s… nice.”

Tony blinked, twice. “I see.”

“She’s a good person.”

“…Okay… so… you got a nice gal-”

“Christine,” Stephen snapped. “Her name is Christine.”

“…And is Christine… here?”

“No… She’s,” Stephen stared into the ground, gesturing with his hand in vague motion.

“Elsewhere…?”

“Yes.”

“…Uh-huh.” There was a short pause in which Tony seemed to be considering something. “You want to go to bed with me?” He was once again closing the distance. Taking half steps at a time. “We could be back at mine like-“ he snaps his fingers.

His gaze shot up, eyes fixing once more on Tony’s. “…I… I never did anything like that.”

“All the more reason.”

It was agonizing. He didn’t want to answer. He knew it wasn’t an answer he wanted to give. But…

“I…,” he groaned. “You’re… you’re _nice_.” His fingers were flexing beside him. He wanted to raise them, reach out, wanted to touch… “…I _can’t_.”

“Okay,” the other replied. There was no bitterness, no resentment. He still had on a smile.

“I…” Stephen stammered. “I can’t. I-…”

But this time, Tony seemed to be backing up for him. Taking one, two steps back. “I get it. It’s okay.”

Part of him… or perhaps all of him, wanted to stop him. Wanted to grab hold of the other and stop him from leaving. But he couldn’t.

Tony was nearly at the door now, “See you around?”

Stephen hesitated for a moment but eventually found his voice once more. “Yes. See you…”

With another smile, Tony swung the door open, heading back inside the club. Leaving Stephen alone in the deserted alleyway. He had to literally tear his eyes away from the door. Force himself to start walking in the other direction.

“Okay…” he muttered to himself as he continued down to the street. “Okay. …Okay. ….Shit. _Fuck!_ ”

* * *

[one week later]

* * *

_San Junipero  
_ _simulation year: 1987_

“What the hell, Steve!” Tony rolled his eyes, simply walking around the taller blonde. But before he got through the door, a hand stopped him.

“Look, okay I know-“

“I’m red lighting you. For real.”

“No! Don’t do that-“

“Then stop this!” Tony was fully facing him now, jaws set and voice turning harsh.

But his coldness melted to a degree as Steve gave him a pained look. God damn those puppy dog eyes Tony always had a hard time saying no to.

“Just… hear me out. Please, Tony.”

He let out a disgruntled huff. “How many guys you think there are in San Junipero? Hundreds? Thousands?”

“I don’t care-“ Steve retorts.

“I’m just saying, Steve. There are plenty of guys out there for you. And girls. With your looks, you don’t even have to try that hard. One you could actually settle down with-“

“The locals? They’re like dead people-“

Ironically, a large swarm of people passed by them. Both he and Steve stepped aside to make room. They were definitely rowdy, happily cheering and sprinting.

“Very lively for dead people,” Tony muttered sarcastically.

Steve rolled his eyes. “I… Tony I don’t want some boring romance. Like… put us in a retirement home type of deal-“

“Well if you just want someone to fuck,” he cut in. “There are options. Go hang out at Sakaar again-“

“It’s not just sex-“

“It was just sex.”

“We had a connection- Always had-“

“Steve,” his voice was firm now, stern. “Really. It was _just_ sex.”

A silence fell. Steve turned his gaze, seeming a little wounded. “But-“

Tony sighed, stepping closer. He put a hand to the other’s cheek, instantly feeling how the blonde leans into it. “You know I’m done with attachments. I went down that road. For a long time. You _know_. You were there. You saw. …I can’t do that again. I just can’t.”

He paused, taking a moment to keep eye contact. “Look. …Steve. I’m… I’m sorry. I’m truly sorry for… leading you on if that’s what I did.” He licked his lips, pulling back his hand. “I knew you… you liked me. And when we met here… I caved in to the _what if_ but it didn’t mean the same for me as it did for you. I know I won’t be able to love anyone again. I’m… I’m done. This is all just… fun till the end of the line.”

A second, then two. And as Steve’s gaze darted to the ground, Tony knew. It was over.

“We had fun. And I am… I really am sorry.”

“Yeah,” Steve swallowed, forcing a smile. “…Okay.”

Tony hesitated for a moment but leaned up, giving a quick kiss on the other’s cheek. Then waved his hand as he walked away. “And enjoy the town for god’s sake!”

Steve let out a huff but nodded.

* * *

She was beautiful. The woman that hung on Tony’s arms tonight. Red, curly hair, tight black pants, boots that flattered her figure in all the right ways.

They were at the bar for a long while, chatting and laughing about things Stephen couldn’t hear from this distance. Then they danced. Danced through three full songs before even considering to slow down.

Unlike Stephen, she leaned into Tony’s touch. Unlike him, she didn’t seem afraid. Unlike him, she was just as bold as Tony, just as daring, just as comfortable with the attention.

He wondered why he was torturing himself this way. Why did he bother to come here again. Why he spent hours alone in the dark corners watching what Tony did with his night. Being reminded of the hint of Tony’s taste on the rim of the cup that was shared. How warm his body felt when he was just inches away. The way his own heart skipped a beat when the other pressed himself close…

It hurt. Hurt to want something he already refused. Hurt to be reminded of what he missed out on. Hurt to feel jealous over someone that he had no claim to.

But it hurt more to stay away.

Stephen glanced up once again from his drink to the pair sitting at several tables over. Tony was leaning heavily against the plush seats, a hand lightly stroking at the woman’s thigh. She was talking, whispering with a smile.

Tony seemed to be enjoying himself, he thought bitterly as he lowered his gaze.

Then he looked up once more. Couldn’t help himself.

Only to find… Tony staring back at him.

The corner of the other’s lips curls into a faint smile.

Stephen had to remember to breathe. He had to remind himself how to breathe.

He vaguely hears Tony excusing himself. Standing to his feet as he made his way toward the back.

Stephen hurried to follow.

* * *

When he entered the bathroom, luckily no one else was there. Only Tony.

The brunette was leaning over towards the mirror, fixing his hair. Didn’t even bother acknowledging him.

Stephen sighed, letting the awkwardness sink in. “I… I don’t know how to do this.”

Tony didn’t even look at him, eyes fixed on his own reflection still. “Do what?” he said in mock innocence.

Stephen let out a huff, exasperated and a little peeved at the lack of attention.

But the other continued to act uncaring, nonchalant. “What do you want to do?”

“Tony… you know.“

“I don’t.” With that he finally faced Stephen. There wasn’t the warm smile from the week prior, no longer the deep fondness. “I don’t actually. I threw myself at you on day one and you shot me down. …Today though, it seems like you can’t take your eyes off me.”

Tony then stepped closer, once again crossing the personal boundaries without a hint of hesitation. “…So which is it? Want me to walk away from you… or get on my knees? …Want me to never speak to you again and ignore your existence… or shout your name as if I’ll never forget.”

Stephen definitely felt the heat rising to his cheeks. “…J-just… help me,” he said almost in a whisper. It sounded desperate, pleading. But he couldn’t care less for his pride at that moment. It was abandoned somewhere during the past week he spent pining. “Can… can you just… make this easy for me?”

There was a pause, complete silence that washed over them. Stephen wondered with a bit of panic if Tony would laugh at him. If the other was going to be vindictive, cruel. But...

“Want me to make it easy for you? To tell you what to do?” Tony stepped even closer.

This time, Stephen stayed completely grounded. Watching, waiting, silently hoping for Tony to just cross that final step.

“Stop you from thinking too much and hurting your pretty little head?”

He swallowed. “…Yes.”

Tony let out a soft huff of a laugh. Turned his gaze downwards for a quick second before looking back up. “Let’s get in my car. We can go to mine. I’ll let you do whatever you can think of that got you this worked up. Whatever you want with me. You good with that?”

He nodded, not fully trust his voice.

“Then let’s do that.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So this Black Mirror episode was honestly one of my favorites. I think Charlie Brooker did an amazing job with the script. I fully admit that the main plotline and the world I got from the original script. 
> 
> Basically I couldn't stop thinking about this particular episode and tweaked details, added things, and changed dialogues to fit IronStrange. I really needed to get it out of my system. Plus excuse to write a bit of flustered Stephen lolololol because some people have recently put the idea in my head ~~...and excuse to write smut in this context~~
> 
> It will probably start deviating a lot more from the original Black Mirror episode starting next chapter... and planning to add the "what happens after" from the original storyline
> 
> Comments & kudos will be greatly appreciated :’)


	2. Part II

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Now... definitely deviating quite a bit from original script-

_San Junipero  
_ _simulation year: 1987_

It didn’t take long for them to arrive. Between Tony’s driving and logics of reality thrown out the window, it hardly took any time at all.

But for Stephen, it was torture. Every second was grating and each minute was agonizing. The anticipation, the anxiety, the tension that seemed to have settled in between them - it was fucking torture.

And Tony had been awfully quiet. In a way that Stephen never expected from the chatterbox the brunette proved himself to be the prior week. It made things a whole lot worse… left Stephen to his thoughts in a way that made his blood boil.

But then again, it was probably done on purpose. Because if there was anything he had learned about Tony, it was that he was incredibly intelligent. Clever mind and sharp-tongued, even manipulative and shrewd when he wanted to be. That he carefully packaged and hid behind the loud, outlandish persona.

Of course, Stephen doesn’t doubt that the cheeriness, the enthusiasm was also part of Tony’s true personality. It was so genuine in a way that could not possibly be all fake. However, it seemed as though Tony knew perfectly, down to a science, how to utilize each side of his nature to his own benefit. When to hide one side, when to over-exaggerate another…

He was fascinating. Fascinating did not even begin to describe the rarity that was Tony.

“Oh…” It came out barely above a whisper.

Stephen slowly peered around, trying to take it all in.

Tony had led them to a large lakeside cabin. It was well constructed, beautifully finished, definitely spacious… but a bit rustic in comparison to what Stephen had in his head. It was nothing average, sure. Everything reeked of elegance down to the perfect finishing of each furniture and the amazing view of the lake from the enormous windows.

He’d bet the sunset could be viewed right from the living room. It would be a sight. The blazing sun disappearing into the waters, painting the sky gold.

But still… if he had to guess the place Tony called home, imagine the place that reflected the other’s personality and lifestyle, this just wasn’t it.

“You like?”

“It’s lovely. It’s… comforting. …But not what I envisioned I suppose.”

Tony let out a snort, “What were you envisioning?”

But it takes a while for the other to formulate a response. His attention settling on several photographs that lined the wall.

There was one with an older man and a teenaged boy. The teen was happily holding up a certificate of some kind upside down.

If Stephen had to take a wild guess, the man was Tony himself. There were obvious similarities, although the goatee and sunglasses was definitely a change from the 20-something-year-old appearance Tony wore at San Junipero. But still, it was not a bad one. So Tony aged quite well, Stephen thought with amusement.

Then his sights fell onto another portrait. A woman with strawberry blonde hair, freckled cheeks, and elegant features. She was beautiful.

Then, a photo of a young girl right next to her’s. Brown hair and large doe eyes that held so much curiosity.

Stephen shrugged. “…I don’t know. Some penthouse in a skyscraper?”

At that, the other suddenly laughed, warm and sincere.

It made Stephen’s head snap back to face the other. He felt like he was missing a joke.

But before he could utter his curiosity, Tony was closing the distance once more. And as his face drew close, Stephen lost his train of thought.

Everything focused to the look in Tony’s eyes. The flashes of curiosity, the sparkle of endless thought, the passion that bled through… Nothing else mattered. Perhaps it never did.

It wasn’t rushed. Every movement made with leisure.

Tony simply wrapped his arms around Stephen’s neck at first, pads of the warm fingers trailing along the skin of the neck, shoulder, upper back, waiting. Stephen wondered for a moment as to what.

“Sweetheart, I made enough moves on you.” The corner of Tony’s lips tugged into a soft smirk. “It’s your turn.”

He could feel the quickening of his pulse.

“…Unless you already changed your mind again.”

Stephen crushed their lips together. It started out desperate, hungry, their tongue soon intertwining as they explored each other’s taste. When they finally broke apart, both were gasping.

“…That…” he said against Tony’s lips. “…That was my move.”

Tony grinned, letting out a huff of laughter, “Damn right that’s your move.”

Stephen soon felt a hand sliding down his own chest, clever fingers working at the belt. He let out a moan, his hip unconsciously buckling at the silent promise. Then… a thought. Instincts and bravado only got you so far.

He grabbed the other’s wrist. Tony looked up at him instantly, the concern quite clear.

"No... it's not like that. I don't want to stop... but-," Stephen swallowed thickly, trying to hastily work up the nerves to admit the next words. “You… you have to show me…”

A second, then two.

He started to worry if Tony would call the whole thing off. Chalking it all up as too much of a hassle. To find him, Stephen, as too much of a hassle.

But then, he saw a smile. A fond smile right before Tony pressed their lips together.

“Good.”

* * *

It doesn’t take long before they find themselves on the large couch by the fireplace. Stephen seated with Tony fully in his lap. Both of their shirts were off, abandoned somewhere on the floor.

Tony leaned in for another kiss as he worked to get Stephen’s pants fully open. Demanding, passionate, intense.

Stephen wrapped a hand on the brunette’s neck, trying to find a little more control in their pace. It made Tony let out a low moan and Stephen feels it on the pads of his finger. That wasn’t his intention but it would be a lie to say that didn’t do something for him in a multitude of ways he doesn't fully understand yet.

Impulsively, his other arm tightens around the brunette’s narrow waist, trying to flush their bodies closer. He needed more fiction, more of the warmth, more… something, anything. Although, Tony was pushing away.

For a brief second, Stephen darted forward, trying to chase the other’s lips. Only to be shoved back in response. He frowned. Quite irritated at being denied something he sorely wants.

Tony chuckled, slowly sliding down off the couch, sinking to his knees between Stephen’s long legs.

The sight of that makes Stephen’s brain short-circuit. “Tony…?”

The other flashed him a smirk, never breaking the eye contact. It wasn’t long before he fully removed Stephen’s pants, tossing them aside. “Let me do this for you. Just lay back and enjoy…”

Stephen swallowed thickly, his eyes watering from lack of blinking. But it was impossible to look away, he felt almost transfixed, following Tony’s every movement.

Yet, when Tony finally wraps his mouth around his half-hard cock, his whole body still jumped in shock.

Stephen threw his head back, letting out a string of curses. A part of his brain was yelling at him how filthy this was but it was so _good_. Even as he shut his eyes closed, all he could see was the image of Tony on his knees, the dark gaze never leaving him.

And Tony was absolutely shameless in the way he completely sank down on the length, sucking and swallowing without hesitation or reserve.

At some point, Tony moaned loudly, creating a wonderful vibration that paired perfectly with the wet heat. Stephen couldn’t help but thrust forward, his cock hitting the back of Tony’s throat. A choking sound and…

_Shit-_

“Oh god-,” Stephen flinched back, letting go of the back of Tony’s head he didn’t even know he was holding down.

How long was he doing that? How long was he holding Tony down while he selfishly only caring for his own pleasure?

“I’m so sorry! I didn’t know I was-“

But Tony already was reaching out, taking hold of Stephen’s hand and guiding it back to his hair.

“It’s all good,” his voice was a little horse but the grin lingered none-the-less. “I was enjoying it.”

“Tony,” he said warningly. “I… don’t want to hurt you-“

“You won’t. I know my limits and I’ll let you know. …Come on, honey. Fuck my throat like you mean it. …Help me make this good for you. Be a little selfish. Rough me up a little if you feel like-“ With that, he slowly sunk back down.

Stephen continued to stare as bit-by-bit his cock disappeared into Tony’s mouth. It was an obscene sight but damn, it was _hot_.

He took a deep breath, in and out, then cautiously threading his fingers in the chocolate locks. He first gave a couple of experimental thrusts, shallow and slow.

Tony moaned, enthusiastically. Perhaps, meant as encouragement. But it felt different from earlier, sounded a bit exaggerated, forced.

He didn’t like it. Sounded fake.

A slight frown formed as the fingers tightened. Then, impulsively, he shoved Tony’s head down completely, bottoming out, his now fully hard length sheathed inside the wet heat.

For a moment, Stephen held him there. Part of him briefly worried maybe he went a little too far. But then, noticed Tony’s right hand had already wondered lower, palming himself through his pants.

God, he really did enjoy this, didn’t he?

Caution quickly thrown to the wind, Stephen continued. Guiding Tony’s head, chasing his own pleasure with more and more assurance. His other hand curiously settled on Tony’s throat, a bit fascinated by how he could feel his own cock thrusting in and out.

“Damn, Tony… God, your mouth- …feels amazing- …I think I might-“

But he doesn’t get to finish that sentence.

The next second, Tony pulled away suddenly.

Stephen groaned at the loss, breathing heavily as the other started to climb on top of him once more, a sly smirk playing on his clever lips. Stephen clawed at him, desperate, needy… for what exactly he wasn’t sure but this can’t be it. This couldn’t be the end…

Tony must have noticed something in his expression because he let out a low chuckle. He leaned forward, sealing their lips together making Stephen taste himself on his tongue. Stephen groaned soundly, buckling upward, grinding their hips together.

“Don’t worry, darling.” Tony moved lower, leaving a trail of kisses along the other’s jawline right up till the shell of the ear. “I’ll give you something better to put this pretty thing into.” He emphasized by reaching a hand down between them, giving Stephen’s length a firm stroke.

His hips snapped up. “Tony…” It sounded more like pleading. Heat rose to Stephen’s cheeks at the thought. But the way Tony was staring at him now… with utter want, as if he was something to be admired… pride seemed rather insignificant. “Please…” He dragged his nail along the other’s back, earning a hiss.

“Want to prep me yourself?” Tony whispered in a low tone. “…Or want me to give you a show?”

That, made him freeze. His brain short-circuiting as flashes of images played in his head. All Stephen could do was simply stared back, wide-eyed and mouth slightly open.

Tony let out a huff, a smirk spreading wide. “You’re thinking about it aren’t you?”

“Well…” he replied, almost matter-of-factly. “It’s quite a mental picture…”

The shorter man laughed, light and airy but lined with a hint of mischievousness. “…Which sounds more appealing?”

But in the end, Stephen definitely knew which he’d pick if the option to be greedy and somehow choose both were not on the table. “I want to do it.”

“Okay, then. …Stay.”

Stephen gave an offended glare as Tony poked him lightly on the nose with the command. Although, the brunette only chuckled warmly at the reaction. In which Stephen gave a dramatic eye roll.

A shift in weight and soon, Tony was completely off him. It doesn’t take long, however, for the brunette to completely undress, picking up a small bottle of lube before returning.

Stephen almost impatiently wrapped an arm around the other’s hips, welcoming back the warmth, the intimacy of skin-to-skin contact that he was starting to think far transcend simple lust.

There was a brief change in Tony’s expression, a hint of something in the eyes. But it was gone just as quickly as it appeared. For a split second, Stephen wondered if he noticed…

If he did, Tony doesn’t mention it. The brunette merely places the lube in Stephen’s hand with a familiar playful smirk. “Let’s start with two fingers.”

It was very clear by how his lack of experience compared to the other but even Stephen knew the obvious. He frowned. “Tony…”

“Nah-uh,” he quickly cuts in. “I’m back in control. I _like_ a bit of a stretch. We start with two.”

Another warning look and Stephen let out a huff. He squeezed the gel onto his hand, spreading it around his fingers, warming it, before reaching over.

“Circle my rim first,” Tony advised as he put his arms around Stephen’s neck. He leaned forward, arching his back, to give his partner better access. “Tease me a little…”

Although, he soon let out a shaky sigh as it rapidly became obvious just how well Stephen followed instruction when he wanted to. “Y-yeah… that’s good. Now push in… a-ah-“

A hand settled on Tony’s lower back, making small comforting circles as the two fingers pressed further into his entrance. A moment to settle, then they experimentally thrust in and out in a steady rhythm.

“Push in further… Y-yep… like that. Ah-… definitely like that.”

Stephen swallowed. Suddenly very painfully reminded of how hard he was and Tony’s continuous string of moaning and whimpering was definitely not lessening it.

“You can go a little faster… W-work me open. Eventually add another finger… You got one job, handsome and it’s to drive me wild and open enough to take your dick.” Tony settled at the crook of Stephen’s neck, mouthing and openly panting on the sensitive skin. Considering all the breathless noise he was making, his tone was surprisingly demanding still. “…And don’t let me come until you’re inside, got it?“

It was all Stephen could do but nod, slowly working his fingers faster and faster.

At some point, however, he had forgotten about his own neglected hard-on. Oh, he was still very much aware of how turned on he was but the focus shifted away from his own needs, crave for fiction for himself.

There was something so satisfying about being the direct source of another’s pleasure. The trill of watching Tony writhe and thrust back and knowing he’s the cause of it, the one Tony is seeking out. 

“Fuck…” Tony sounded gone, gasping as he spread his legs wider, making their bodies press together till their hardened members were grinding up against one another.

Stephen cursed as well, only to have it be swallowed up by Tony’s lips. It was frantic, all tongue and teeth. He can basically taste the desperate want on Tony’s tongue.

  
“I can’t wait for you to fuck me,” Tony whispered as they parted for the moment. “G-go faster… a-ah… shit just… ahh-“

“Hold on… just a bit more, Tony. …God, you’re tight…” He finally added the third finger, dragging in and out, once in awhile scissoring and stretching. Tony’s muscles were starting to adjust, loosening little by little.

Neither was hiding much anymore. Both breathing heavily, their whole body tense and heated. They were moving in sync, eyes never leaving for long.

Tony cried out as Stephen suddenly curled his fingers. Soon they were pressing along a certain bundle of nerves. But before he could feel smug about it, Tony was already lifting himself away, shoving Stephen’s hand aside.

He opened his mouth to say something, perhaps to make a complaint, but… “FUCK!”

Stephen threw his head back as Tony lowered himself onto his cock. Pleasure shot up his spine as he unconsciously buckled, shoving himself deeper inside the other.

For a second, Stephen forgets to breathe. The brunette winced but doesn’t seem to mind all too much, a grin quickly settling on his lips. Stephen tried to thrust up again, greedily wanting more of the delicious friction, the warmth, the tightness… although this time, a hand pressed onto his hips, stilling him.

“Lay back, darling,” Tony said as he pressed couple kisses on the high cheekbones. “I’m going to ride you. …And if you’re good, I’ll let you take the reigns a bit after I had my fun.”

He groaned, loudly and openly. Tried to reach out, tried to get a better hold on Tony to see if he could… But Tony was quicker. He swiftly enclosed his fingers around Stephen’s wrist, pinning them above his head with surprising force.

“Are you going to be good for me, handsome? I told you… I’ll make it worth your while if you do.”

Stephen let out an exasperated huff but after a moment of consideration, gave a small nod. Tony rewarded him with another filthy kiss.

He leaned further back, trying to get comfortable as Tony have his way with him. Tony set a steady pace, easing himself up then back down, impaling himself on Stephen’s cock.

At first, it was just frustrating. Stephen had to use much of his focus on simply not thrusting his hips up to chase his own pleasure. But after several minutes of Tony whispering endless phrases in his ears, he felt his annoyance slowly melting away. Then came the peculiar thrill of being held, being used.

“You’re so good for me, sweetheart… You feel so good inside me… filling me up-“

He swallowed, hard. Trying to find his voice again. “…Stephen.”

Tony slowed his movements, staring directly at him. “What…?”

  
“Stephen,” he repeated with a disgruntled huff. He hoped to make his voice sound firm, resolute but his gaze falters, looking away to a far off corner. “Use my name. Not some pet names you probably used on dozens of people just because you can’t remember their actual names-“ He doesn’t know why he feels it’s important. But it is.

There was a pause. Silence while both stopped all movement, catching their breaths. But then, Tony smiled, threading his fingers through Stephen’s hair, coaxing him to look back at him. And he does, eventually.

“Stephen…” It comes out in a murmur at first, barely audible. It felt more intimate than anything they have done so far and that was… bizarre.

And the pure fondness that was paired with it, the sincerity in the whiskey gaze, Stephen finds it hard to hold on to the petty jealousy.

“You feel perfect… so perfect- …Stephen…” A moan and a full-body shiver. “Fuck me.”

He didn’t need telling twice. The next heartbeat, Stephen followed the command with an uncontrolled thrust, gasping as his hands tighten on Tony’s hips. It felt so good, so tight and warm. His hips jerked forward without much thought, mindlessly chasing the feeling.

“Stephen- AH!... T-that’s good… so good, Stephen… h-arder… harder please-“

“God, Tony…” He was so close he could taste it.

He could tell Tony was too. He was clamping down on him, becoming impossibly tight. Tony whimpered, convulsing as his whole body becoming rigid before going limp.

Stephen pulled the other close, arms firmly wrapping around, nails digging in.

Then, his own vision turned white as he finally came. Tony twitched, whining as he undoubtedly felt the shot of warmth inside him.

* * *

They only moved to haphazardly rearrange themselves, settling to lie fully on the couch, Stephen on his back, Tony next to him cuddling close while using one of Stephen’s arm as a pillow. A sense of lazy satisfaction washing over them.

Between the warm blanket tossed over them, the crackling fire, Tony’s warm body pressing against his, Stephen felt fully content, at ease. The feeling that… it couldn’t possibly get any better than this.

“…So you never slept with a man?”

The question came after a long period of silence. The hand that was playing with Tony’s hair froze, although quickly resuming in the next second.

“That’s not a critique,” Tony went on. “I mean… you’re fucking _great_. Top of my list of best sex-“

“How many are on that list?” Stephen cut in swiftly.

The other raised an eyebrow but no verbal answer.

He wished he could just let it go. He knew perhaps he should. But found that he can’t. His stubbornness getting the better of him. “How many have you slept with?

“Didn’t peg you as the jealous type-“

“Over… twenty?”

Now Tony lifted himself a little, his head supported by the knuckles of his hand. Stephen’s hand fell, drifting down to settling on the brunette’s hips instead.

“Fifty? …In the hundreds?”

To his irritation, Tony merely smirked. “You _are_ jealous-“

His fingers tightened as he looked away with a huff.

“If it helps at all…” Tony continued, his tone a bit softer. “I haven’t been with many men… but you are the best I’ve had.”

Stephen turned to him with an exasperated look.

Tony chuckled. “I mean it.” He leaned in, taking his time to leave a firm kiss on Stephen’s lips. “…The way you feel inside me… The way you look at me with such amazement… As if I’m something so precious-“

“You are.” He blurted out without thinking. Wondered for a moment how stupid that may have sounded and yet, he found he didn’t mind. It was true. Stephen honestly believed it was true.

And he felt Tony shiver. The smile faltered on the brunette as he stared directly, searching in Stephen’s expression for any hint of... doubt? Was that what Tony was trying to find?

Stephen licked his lips. “…Never with a man.”

“Hm?”

“…I… I never slept with a man.” Then with a deep inhale. “Never with anyone.”

Tony was frowning now, “Not anyone?”

“No one. Nowhere.”

“Wow. …I mean. …Really?” The other honestly sounded surprise. Genuinely surprised. “I can’t believe someone didn’t snatch you up already. How on earth have you managed to hide from everyone-“

Stephen lowered his gaze, unsure what to say anymore.

“You’ve had relationships though…”

“…No. Not… really-“

“Hello,” Tony pressed teasingly. “You got a fiancé.”

“That’s… it’s complicated.”

“…Yeah, I’d bet.”

“…When did you know? …That you liked men?”

“…Uh… I like women too." Tony punched a fist into the air. "Equal rights!”

“Okay..." Stephen went on after a short laugh. "...But when did you _know_? Did you always… just know...?”

Tony stared at him for a long while. This… this Stephen can identify. Uncertainty, skepticism... doubt, hesitation, reluctance. Fear. Fear of taking that first step towards the other person. Opening up the chance to be seen, to be understood… or be disappointed.

Tony didn’t seem used to it. Any of it. Stephen thought maybe to say something, change the topic but…

“I was married to a woman. Had a string of lovers for years but… then- I married her. For a long time, I was married. I always _knew_. I mean… I experimented in college and knew it wasn’t just a phase. But in life, it was easier just sleeping with women. My life was very public. Still, I was attracted to other men. Some new executive at the company…” He let out a laugh under his breath. Shaking his head slightly as if recalling a fond memory or two. “Friends, teammates, some hot waiter who served me… There were crushes. _My god_ were there crushes-”

Tony seemed halfway lost in thought, perhaps a trip down memory lane. A small smile played on his lips, the honeyed gaze sparkling with lifelong surmount of emotions.

Stephen couldn’t help but mirror the smile. There was something wonderful about seeing the other so… vulnerable.

“I never acted on any of it… Never did anything. Not since her…” The smile falters for a moment and with it, a display, a hint of sadness Stephen never saw before in the brunette. “…I was in love with her. I really…. was in love with her. …But she chose not to stick around.”

A shaky sigh and he down casted his eyes briefly. But when Tony next looked up, the usual smirk was plastered back on his face, followed by the familiar airy, carefree tone. “So now… it’s just me. And I’m passing through. And before I leave, I’ll have a good time. _I’m just gonna have a good time_.”

Silence fell between them. Everything completely still but the crackling of the open flame.

Tony continued grinning. As if trying to convince him and the rest of the world that everything was fine and dandy. 

But all it did was tug at Stephen’s heart. He wanted to say something, anything to stop Tony from seeming so…

“Time’s nearly up,” Tony said glancing at the large wall clock over the fireplace. He slid a hand down Stephen’s back, then over the hips. “…If you want… I can do that thing again with my mouth you seemed to _very much_ like... one last time?“

“No… I-…” He stopped Tony’s wandering hand, eventually coaxing their fingers together. “Tony, you don’t owe me anything for listening.”

But the brunette appeared unconvinced, still waiting for a request or even demand of some kind. Stephen really had to wonder what kind of life Tony had lived till now to be this wary of another’s intentions, to expect the selfish intentions. And worse, not seemed bothered by it at all.

“…Let’s just lie here,” Stephen said softly. He tried to smile, gently pulling the other closer till their bodies were nearly flushed, their faces barely inches apart. “I just want to hold you.”

And he means it. That’s all he could want right then. In the moment, lying here peacefully, enjoying the warmth of Tony’s body next to his. Contentment Stephen never knew existed till now.

But he doesn’t close his eyes. Nor does Tony. 

From such close distance, Stephen can trace every little detail of the other’s face, commit it to memory he’s not likely to forget any time soon.

And as second passed, then two, Stephen notices something in the other’s expression that's hard to place. Tony looked as if he wanted to shift his gaze, run away, and at the same time, couldn’t.

Couldn’t because maybe… just maybe, he dares to hope. 

There is something about being seen. Actually be seen. 

To be known. To be understood. Especially after long periods of hiding. A long period of being disregarded or even ignored. 

And just maybe… he dares to hope it’s real.

* * *

[one week later]

* * *

 _San Junipero  
_ _simulation year: 1987_

It would be a lie to say Stephen didn’t look forward to the following week. Counted the days till he could return to San Junipero. To see Tony. His thoughts always trailed back to Tony.

But for once in his life, he didn’t deny himself. He allowed it. Allowed his mind to aimlessly hope, wonder, lead back to those soft chocolate locks and large doe eyes. Without care, without doubts and caution…

That was, until Stephen couldn’t find him.

Tony was nowhere to be found at the Avengers. He walked around the club several times to make sure, checked the ins and outs thoroughly. It was odd. It was never difficult to spot the brunette. He was always here, always at the center of attention.

Stephen tried not to let his mind jump to the worst, the endless _what-ifs_.

But Tony had mentioned he was just simply passing through. What if… he was gone. For good.

“Have you seen Tony?” Stephen shouted over the noise.

The bartender looked up at him. “What’s that?”

“Tony! Have you seen him?”

“Haven’t seen him all night!”

Stephen peered around once more at the dance floor, a bit concerned now.

“Have you tried the Sakaar?”

His head snapped back to the other. “What _is_ the Sakaar?”

* * *

Sakaar was… chaotic.

That was honestly the best way Stephen can describe the place. Like the Avengers, it appeared to vaguely be a glorified club. Dimply lit, flashing colors, equipped with several bars - except there wasn’t a dance floor.

Instead, an enormous, fenced off stage was situated at the center of the main room. Two men were already caged in it, both bloody from a fight. They were a lot of punching, screaming, while the spectators on the ground jumped, cheered, yelled.

Looking upward, there were several floors of balcony and private viewing rooms that overlooked the stage. And once finding the stairs, Stephen made his way up, noting several pairs… or even threes and fours that were rather handy with each other despite being in a public space.

But it wasn’t until he arrived at the upper floor when it truly sunk in that perhaps Tony was exactly right. And he had been worried for naught. San Junipero was definitely a party town. His little dance with Tony that Stephen thought was so scandalous? It was nothing in comparison to this.

There was no shortage of people on the second level, although they were much less rowdy than the floor below. Some were in a crowd, some in pairs, some leisurely watched the fight with a drink in hand, some… definitely had other things in mind.

Many were hardly clothed. Some had very distinct outfits. Lounging about in one of the many enormous couches, hands wandering all over each other’s skin, lips in lock.

Moans and screams filled the air. Whispers that Stephen couldn’t fully make out. Then a defining sound of what seemed like a whip crack.

His head snapped to the direction. A muffled yelling could be heard from one of the darkened hallways. Several doors lined the path. Most likely led to smaller, private rooms. He had no doubt in his mind at this point what those were used for.

After another minute or so, Stephen swallowed. It was hard to think in such a place. Too many stimuli, too many new details. It was disorienting.

He took a step back, then another. But before he could fully make up his mind to leaving, he collided with someone.

“Woah!”

“Sorry-"

But when both parties locked eyes, they paused, a bit stunned.

“Hey, I know you from somewhere-“ Steve said slowly. Then, after a thought, he opens his mouth again, only to hesitate. “…A- …Avengers…”

The blonde let out a sigh, giving his friend a look, muttering. “I can never get used to that. Why did he have to name that place that-”

The friend, who Stephen just now notices, merely chuckled in response, arms crossing.

But the next second, the clear blue eyes were back on Stephen. “…Tony’s friend, right?”

“…Ah… yes.”

Without meaning to, Stephen took a glance again at Steve’s right, to get a better read on the blonde’s companion. The man stood a little off to the side, calm and composed in demeanor. Dark brown hair, squared jaw, light blue eyes… and a metal arm.

If his mind was not completely fixated on Tony, he may have had some questions but…

“…Do you know where to find him? Has he been here?”

There was a pause in which both Steve and his friend simply stared. A small frown starting to form on the blonde’s expression.

“You too, huh?” he said finally. There was pity underlining those words.

Stephen didn’t respond. He didn’t know how. And he certainly didn’t really want to think about the implication of that statement.

Steve let out another deep sigh, rubbing the back of his neck. “…Try… try a different time. Seen him couple times in the 80s, mid-90s, 2000s on and off too.” Then there was the resigned smile, a bit forced but still very much sympathetic. “…He’s worth a shot, right?”

Stephen considered the words, then nodded. “…Thank you.”

* * *

[one week later]

* * *

 _San Junipero  
_ _simulation year: 1980_

_“Introducing the totally redesigned Chrysler Cordoba. All the luxury you expect is here. But so is gas mileage.”_

Stephen briefly glanced at the rows of TVs that lined the store window. It all depicted the same model of luxury coupe accompanied by a nicely dressed salesman. But he hardly stopped, continuing to walk at a fast pace towards one particular nightclub further down the street.

The layout itself was not all that different from what he remembers. The same location of the bar, the large dance floor at the center, arcade games lining the right side of the entrance, the loud music blasting.

♪ _Gotta make a move to a town that’s right for me~ Well, I talk about it, talk about it, talk about it, talk about it, talk about it, talk about it, talk about movin’~_ ♫

Although, there was a visible change to the overall fashion of the crowd. Also that lack of neon many signs he’d gotten used to seeing.

“Hey!”

Stephen spun around, noticing a familiar face. “Oh. Hey.”

Scott smiled nodding towards the game he had been playing. “Golden age, right?”

“Right…” He tried to smile back but his attention was half elsewhere. Mainly too busy peering amongst the crowd, looking for a particular brunette.

“You playing or…?”

“Uh…Sorry,” Stephen said quickly, shaking his head. “…I… I’m looking for someone.” With that, he turned around, walking into the crowd.

Scott nodded, a bit hesitantly. “M-maybe next time?”

* * *

[one week later]

* * *

 _San Junipero  
_ _simulation year: 1996_

♪ _Isn’t it ironic? Don’t you think? ...It’s like rainnnnn~ on your wedding day~_ ♫

Stephen skipped from year to year. Backward and forward from 1987, the simulation year he started with. He continuously checked the Avengers along with several nightclubs in the area. Once in a while going back to Sakaar, just in case.

But still, no sign of Tony.

He used to be fascinated by all this. The change of scene, the various fashions, the difference in music between eras. But none held his attention for long. It all felt so trivial now.

“TONY?!” he yelled as he pounded the door.

Stephen tried to peer through the curtain but there was no light inside the cabin, no movements. He turned around, watching the sun disappearing over the hills over the lake.

* * *

[one week later]

* * *

 _San Junipero  
_ _simulation year: 2002_

A week after week passed with no sign of Tony.

Stephen was nothing if not stubborn but even he started to wonder if it was time to face reality.

♪ _La la la~ La la la la la~ I just can’t get you out of my head. Boy your lovin’ is all I think about._ ♫

As usual, he wandered into the Avengers. Wandered around the dance floor, searching through the crowd. A bit of him still hopes every time he sees someone remotely similar in Tony’s height and build. Someone with the messy, windswept hair and large doe eyes. And a part of him dies with every disappointment.

He usually runs into Scott whenever he passes the arcade section. The other was friendly enough, a bit awkward but definitely good-natured. Stephen doesn’t mind briefly chatting with him as he waits an hour or two to see if Tony would appear.

Today, however, in the simulated year 2002, the game seemed quite different.

♪ _I just can’t get you out of my head. Boy it’s more than I dare to think about._ ♫

There were more colors to the screen, less blocky in graphics. A song played loudly over the speakers of the machine as Scott enthusiastically jumped up and down onto the pink and blue arrows. And next to him…

♪ _Won’t you stay~ Won’t you lay~ Stay forever and ever and ever and ever~ La la la~ La la la la la~_ ♫

Stephen stood still. Simply gawking at the sight of Tony stomping on the arrow pads in time with the music. Another couple seconds and there were cheering coming from the machine. Blocked letters of CLEARED flashing brightly on the screen.

“YEAH!” Tony exclaimed as he turned to Scott.

Both laughed as they high fived. Stephen couldn’t help but smile at the sight. They genuinely looked happy at that moment. A childlike, carefree happiness. Then…

Tony turned slightly more to the side.

And their eyes meet.

“…Hi,” Stephen whispered softly.

The smile falters from Tony’s lips.

“Bathroom!” the brunette exclaimed before bolting.

Scott glanced around, clearly confused. Peering from Stephen to Tony, then back and forth.

But Stephen didn’t bother lingering. He ran after Tony in full sprint. “HEY!”

Tony ran straight into the crowd, darting around the dancers. Stephen hurried after him, eyes not leaving the brunette’s back. Eventually, catching up right outside the bathroom door.

He grabbed ahold of Tony’s wrist, finger wrapping tight. “No, you- wait a minute!”

Tony spun around then, irritation clear. “Why are you here?!”

Stephen winced at the tone. It was harsh, cruel even, a complete 180 from what he remembers. It hurt. Hurt to see those eyes his so fond of glaring at him.

“I was looking for you…” he barely managed “…W-where did you go?”

Tony darted his gaze, seeming to want to stare at just about anything other than Stephen. He shrugged. “…Felt like a change of music.”

Then it occurred to him. Loud and clear finally. “…You hid from me.”

He saw the other freeze. The next second, however, his eyes were focused back on Stephen. “One,” he snapped bitterly. “I did not!”

It sounded so childish that had Stephen frowning.

“Two, I owe you zero! And three…” He blinks couple times, fast. “SEE POINT TWO!”

With that, Tony made another run for it, darting through the door of the bathroom. Stephen cursed, following without much hesitation.

“This is not about who owes who!” He could feel his temper rising to this throat, no longer able to control the endless amount of emotions from seeping into his voice. He needed Tony to get it. To understand. “…You…you don’t know who I am. You don’t know what this means for me!”

But as Tony turned to face him once more, as Stephen get a glimpse of the pained expression the other was wearing… Perhaps he didn’t really understand either.

The words that were uttered, however, were another story. Abrasive, cold, but almost emotionless. "Jesus! Stop with the dramatics! ...This is why I hate virgins."

" _Excuse me_?"

"If I knew you were going to be goddamn clingy I wouldn't have bothered. It was just sex! ...Still don't get it? How dense are you?"

Stephen simply stood completely stunned.

“This-“ Tony lifted both his arms before letting them drop to his side. “This is supposed to be fun. It’s supposed to fucking be _fun_.” Then he gestured between the two of them. “And _this_? …This is not fun. …Okay? …This is… Not. Fun.”

His mouth felt completely dry, breath catching in his throat. Stephen looked away, fixing his sight to the far wall as he gritted his teeth. Then… feeling of wetness on his cheeks, his eyes burning. Was he crying? Actually crying? He cursed, quickly wiped them off, embarrassed.

“Uh-…Okay,” Tony said in a whisper. The harshness had completely disappeared. “Hey… look, don’t… don’t do that-“

A hand reached out but Stephen slapped it away. “So now you feel bad?” He wanted to laugh but couldn’t muster the energy.

“… Maybe you should feel bad,” he hissed, swallowing up the pain, the agony he could feel down to the bones.

Then, a thought. Tony didn’t feel this. Not like how Stephen feels this. Tony doesn’t feel the excruciating pain, the awful disappointment. He doesn’t feel any of this.

God, he was so stupid.

He had thought… he honestly thought…

Stephen gritted his teeth, hands balling into fists. The next words coming out with all the hate he could muster.“…Or at least feel _something_.”

Without so much as a backward glance, Stephen rushed out. The door closing behind with a resonating bang.

Tony watched him go, completely still.

It got quiet. Suddenly, too quiet.

An emptiness Tony was all too familiar with. And yet, it finally occurred to him, he hadn’t felt this since a couple weeks back.

Since he met…

But then came the flooding of emotions. The sentiment, the awareness, the feelings he carefully buried away.

Buried along with… the day he buried…

He shut his eyes closed, turning around. When he opened them again, he was faced with the large mirror of the bathroom, his own reflection staring back.

And he hates it.

Impulsively, he threw a punch, hard. There was a loud crack as the fist met glass. The mirror immediately splintered upon impact, shattering. His reflection breaking into several pieces.

Tony stared down at his own hand. There was no blood.

When he stared back up, however, the mirror stood completely unmarked. Back in one clean piece. Not even a scratch.

* * *

“Stephen-?! STEPHEN!”

Tony rushed out into the street, pacing as he turned left and right. He knew it was a long shot but he had to try. There was a chance he may somehow be able to…

When was the last time he allowed himself to hope? It felt so odd. Distant and unfamiliar.

Then he spotted a couple nearby, not far from the exit of the building, lingering next to their car. They must have been there for a while.

“Hey!” Tony called out. “Have you seen a guy, mid-twenties… tall, high cheekbone, dark hair silver streaks, piercing gray-blue eyes?”

Instead of answering, they turn their gaze upwards, somewhere behind the brunette. Tony blinked but still spun to see the direction they were staring.

Over on the roof, Stephen was sitting on the edge, his legs dangling.

_Shit shit shit!_

He spots the fire escape that was already drawn out within reach. Tony sprinted towards it, quickly grabbing hold and climbing. He heard muttering behind him though hardly cared to understand.

"Must be a newbie..."

"Testing the limits, I bet-" 

It took a minute or two for him to get to the top. Adrenaline was pumping in his blood.

“Please… tell me you have the pain slider set to zero.”

Stephen let out a huff, kicking his feet a little. He thought about maybe not answering completely but, “…Yeah. I think so.”

“Hey…” Tony calmly made his way closer, carefully taking each step. “Listen-“

But the other kept his gaze fixed on the passerby below. “How many of them are dead? Like what percentage?”

“As in full-timers?” Once Tony got close, he lowered his weight, sitting right next to Stephen. He could feel the other’s heat. If he just shifted even just slightly, their tights would brush up against each other. “…Fluctuates from 80 to 86 usually.”

That made Stephen frown. How did Tony know that number?

Although, before he got a chance to question it, the brunette already continued on.

“I’m sorry.”

Stephen rolled his eyes. “I’m not going to jump,” he stated with a huff.

“Okay. Good.” Tony answered. For a brief moment, his tone took on a familiar playful tone. But then, his expression visibly turned serious. Almost uncharacteristically so. “…But I’m sorry still. I’m… sorry. I really am.”

Stephen let out a sigh, shifting to face the other. He had half a thought to snap something distasteful. Make some snide comment or at the very least refuse the apology.

But then their eyes meet. And he just doesn’t have the heart.

He wondered, quite bitterly, if he would ever have the heart to refuse Tony in million lifetimes if the other just looked at him like _that._

“It’s just… I don’t have much time.” Tony cleared his throat. His gaze darting about all over the place before settling back onto Stephen. The brunette appeared genuinely unnerved, anxious. His body unconsciously shivering. “I don’t know… how long I’ll be around. And in the time I’ve been here, I said I wouldn’t… you know… _do feelings_. …You freaked me out. I didn’t… I don’t want to _like_ anyone. I _can’t_. I just can’t do this again…” His voice broke. “…So you’re just…” He let out a small laugh. It was empty, harsh. “…totally fucking inconvenient. …I wasn’t prepared for _this_ …”

Then Stephen sees it, the tears that started to form on the other’s eyes.

“I wasn’t prepared for _you_. Wasn’t prepared to _want_ something so damn muc-“

He doesn’t let Tony finish. Before he knew it, he already leaned in. Grabbing a hold of Tony’s neck, pressing their lips together.

* * *

They barely make it through the bedroom door. Master bedroom, if Stephen had to guess.

Quite honestly, Stephen would have settled for the floor right by the door but Tony seemed insistent on dragging them upstairs. How the brunette still had the wits to navigate around the cabin, all the while never stopping their frantic activities? He really had no clue.

What he did know, however… very well, in fact, was how Tony probably visions this all to go.

And it certainly wasn’t a shock to be shoved harshly onto the enormous bed, Tony soon climbing on top of him, pulling at his collar, nails scraping skin, clothes being thrown around hastily.

He had to. He had to say something.

“Tony,” Stephen drew himself away, grabbing a hold of the other’s wrist for emphasis.

For a split second, Tony looked quite puzzled, peering at him in question. Then, the wheels turning…

“Tony… I want-… I need to be…“

He doesn’t even wait. Seemed to have already figured out what this was about. “How do you want me?”

Stephen swallowed, hard. “…You sure?”

“Yeah. Yeah, I’m fucking sure.” Tony leaned in for another quick kiss. Then slowly, lifted himself off a little. “You’re running the show tonight.”

It got completely quiet as they stared at one another. It wasn’t long till their breathing becoming in sync.

“I want you on your back,” he said evenly. Shamelessly, the piercing stare traced over the other’s naked skin. “I want your eyes on me as I take you apart.”

Tony raised an eyebrow at the sudden boldness. There was definitely no hesitation, no uncertainty in the way the other spoke now. The sudden change was a little surprising but quite intriguing. “…You’re a fast learner, aren’t you?”

Stephen gently pushed forward and Tony, taking the cue, leaned back.

“Practice.”

That made Tony freeze. “What practice?” he snapped with a frown. Then after a pause. “…With who?”

Stephen merely sealed his lips over Tony’s, amused by how Tony doesn’t refuse it even with the newfound irritation. When they parted for air, there was still hardness in the other’s gaze.

He grinned, tracing the line of Tony’s jaw with the pad of his thumb. “Who’s the jealous one now?”

The frown deepened, his mouth opening to make some sort of remark.

Stephen let out a chuckle. “…Don’t worry. I’m just a fast learner.”

The brunette still looked a little unconvinced. As if there was a debate in his head of how to react. “…Really?”

Oh, so he really did care.

Stephen smiled, feeling a bit smug. “There’s no one else, Tony,” he said warmly. “There hasn’t been anyone else.”

With another annoyed huff, Tony turned his sights away, still evidently pouting. Although there was definitely relaxing in his shoulders at the confirmation.

He doesn’t waste any more time, situating himself on top, leaning forward to trail wet kisses down the other’s chest. “…If anything… I practiced with myself. Experimented. Touched myself thinking of you…”

Tony groaned, loudly, openly. He wrapped his legs around the taller man's waist, trying to draw them closer. "Shit- ...how do you know how to press all my buttons."

Stephen tried to hide his smirk.

* * *

“I’m getting married next week…”

“To the lovely Christine?”

Stephen let out a huff. “Don’t say it like that. She’s… doing me a huge favor.”

Tony let out a chuckle. He pulled the sheet over them a little better as he snuggled closer. “Doing _you_ a favor? ...Wow. I gotta meet this gal.” A smirk played on his lips. Though for a moment, it fades just a bit. “…You’re still going to go through with that?”

“…I have to.”

“You _have_ to?”

Stephen sighed, running a hand through Tony’s hair. Watching languidly as the soft locks slipped between his fingers one by one. “She’s… She really is a good person… My family doesn’t approve but…” There was a short pause. “And I know she pities me. That pisses me off and it’s unfair because she’s…” His voice faltered. Wasn’t sure he wanted to continue and yet, unsure how to stop.

Then, the softness of Tony’s lips swallows away his thoughts.

Stephen sighed into it. For a moment that’s all they do, lazily kiss, tongue intertwining, as if they had all the time in the world.

But when they part, the reality inevitably flooded back in a rush.

“You said… you didn’t know how long there is. What did you mean?”

Tony tensed, hesitating. But eventually, there is a smile, soft and somber. “They tell me three months. It’s spread basically everywhere. But they’ve said three months before six months ago so… what do they know? ...I see movie previews now... it's like- oh hey that sounds interesting... but then I wonder... will I be around when that comes out.”

Oddly enough, however, a hint of hopefulness lined Stephen’s tone. “So… you’re going to stay here? Pass over? …Go full time…? ...If you stay here then those movies-"

“No,” he replied firmly. Then with the usual grin plastered on his face, “When I’m done. I am done.”

“What?” Stephen pushed himself up a little, trying to get a better look at Tony’s face. “That’s…” Stupid, he wants to say but held his tongue. “Why-?”

His heart was pounding at his ears. He tried to keep calm, feign neutrality the best he can but his mind was screaming at him. He wants to reach out, grab on to Tony and somehow never let go. He wouldn’t… Tony couldn’t leave him like this…

“Pepper… That’s… My wife’s name was Pepper.” Tony lowered his gaze, a soft sigh leaving his lips. “She died just five years ago. So she had the opportunity to stay in San Junipero. Pass over. …But she didn’t take it. Didn’t want to take it.”

Stephen let out a huff. “Why wouldn’t anyone take it?”

“She… we both- …she had her viewpoint. There were things she believed and things she didn't believe in… and this place was one of them. Wouldn’t even visit… take the trial run.”

“What-“ Disbelief was clearly etched on Stephen’s face. “I… okay, well… I wasn’t sure I wanted to try it at first but… Without this place, I would have never met someone like you-“

Tony let out a chuckle, “Yeah, you could have-“

“No, I wouldn't have-…”

“We could have met outside of all this.”

“No,” he repeated, a little firmer. “You… If we really met… If you _really_ met me…You wouldn’t like me.”

He stroked Stephen’s cheek, tracing the high cheekbone lightly with his index finger. “I think I would have liked you just fine.”

“You wouldn’t,” Stephen shot back a little bitterly. “If you really met me… _out there_. You wouldn’t have liked me at all. I would have bored you.”

But Tony looked unconvinced still. “Try me.”

“No really…”

“ _Try me.”_

“There is no point. I don’t want you to see-“

Tony scoffed. “Where are you? Where are you really?”

Stephen shook his head, running a hand over his face. “Tony…”

“I’m in Malibu,” the other went on. “Malibu, California. So come on…” He pushed Stephen back to fully laying on his back once more, slowly, languidly climbing on top of him. “I can see that you want to.”

“I want…” his brain short-circuits momentarily. “I want anything you’re willing to give me…”

Tony rewarded him with a kiss, a smirk stretching wide. “…So where are you?”

“New York,” he replied, still a bit hesitant. “…Metro General.”

“That’s no distance!”

“That’s across the country.”

Fear clawed at Stephen. The endless plays of _what if_. …The reality… If Tony knew… if he saw…

“I like traveling. When they let me. Which is not that often anymore…”

“So they won’t let you anyways and-…”

He didn’t want to get his hopes up. Didn’t want to be disappointed.

“Oh, I’ll _make_ them let me.”

Stephen closed his eyes shut. “I don’t… I don’t want you to see… the state I’m…”

But a firm hand stops him. On his shoulder, pressing down gently. Stephen opened his eye once more. Tony was no longer smiling.

“Hey. And I’m dying. … _I am dying_. Whatever you are… it can’t scare me. Let me visit. I want to say hi.”

Silence washed over them. There was nothing except the lingering gaze, the heartbeat that pounded their ears. So many things unsaid.

And just before the clock strikes midnight, he nodded. 

* * *

Malibu, California – Stark Mansion

* * *

 _Earth  
_ _year: 2051_

“Mr. Stark…”

Tony opened his eyes, blinking to adjust to the light. It appeared to be after daybreak. Probably passed 11 am if Peter was here shaking him awake.

He took a deep breath, trying to push himself off the bed but nearly failing to find the strength. Peter almost immediately darted forward, supporting his back, helping him to a sitting position.

Once propping Tony's back with extra pillows, Peter turned to fidget with the curtains, opening it and the large windows just a bit. Warm light filled the air, along with the distant sounds of the crashing waves.

He stared at the kid for a moment… _well_ , he thought with amusement and pride _, definitely no longer a kid…_ then down to his own wrinkled hands.

Right. He was no longer in San Junipero.

No longer in the simulated reality.

So back to this useless body of an 81-year-old.

God, the pain was always so frustrating.

“You know, Peter,” he said with a sigh. “You can be doing much better things than taking care of an old man.”

Peter simply handed him a glass of water. “I'd rather be here.”

Tony took it, taking a large gulp before handing it back.

It hurt knowing how sincere that statement was. The corner of Tony’s lip twitched. “Kid… I left my company to you for a reason. Let some nurses do this part… you shouldn’t have to do this. You’re not a nurse or an assistant-”

“48.”

Tony frowned.

“I’m 48, Mr. Stark,” Peter with a huff, although the smile still lingered. “I’m not a kid. And _because_ I’m not a kid, I can make my own smart decision. And I decide there is nothing more important than taking care of you. Plus you don’t do well with unfamiliar people in your home.”

Tony scoffed. “I’ll get used to it.”

Peter bluntly ignored him. Opting to focus on tapping away at a tablet, pulling up couple files before settling it to the elder man’s lap. “So here’s the summary from yesterday’s board meeting. You’re right, Simone caved. …And here are the stock numb-“

But Tony put a hand over Peter’s, quickly silencing him. “It’s not my company anymore, Peter. We went over this. You do what you think is best… I taught you everything I can.”

For a moment, Peter stood completely still, his eyes not leaving the other. “It’ll always be your company too. I’ll make sure of that.”

Tony smiled but turned his gaze away. A sigh soon escaping from his lips at a sudden shot of pain.

Peter tensed. He always did.

And this was the reason the billionaire didn’t want Peter around anymore. It was getting harder and harder to hide away his discomfort. Knew it would be even worse towards the end. And Peter… the kid always cared too much.  
  


He licked his lips, trying to come up with a distraction. “You still going to fit into those spandex with all the lazing around you're doing here?”

Peter gave him a look. “You _know_ it’s not spandex.”

“So still saving the world, huh? At your age?”

“You just called me a kid and now you call me too old? Make up your mind, will you?” He let out a huff, though there was hardly any bite to his words. “And you didn’t stop your superhero gig till what? In your mid-50s?”

Tony smirked.

“Oh, I intend to beat your record.”

Then Peter stood a little straighter by the bed. “…Is there anything else I can do for you right now? …How was San Junipero, by the way? I heard from a grapevine Cap somehow managed to get a license to visit a few months back...”

Tony let out a short laugh. “Yeah, I ran into him couple weeks ago. …Well, technically, there is only an age requirement for the license and Cap is, on paper, older than all of us.”

“Huh… that’s true. Someone on logistics was asking if you might want to change the guidelines. If this is a loophole…”

“No,” came the firm reply. “I think it’s honestly doing him some good. Therapeutic in a way.”

Peter smiled. “…Okay. …Well, I’m going to go get your breakfast.” With that, he headed for the door.

Tony closed his eyes, trying to take deep breaths in and out. Trying not to focus on the stiffness of his body, the dullness of his mind.

_~~“Tony, you don’t owe me anything for listening.”~~ _ ~~~~

_~~“I was looking for you…”~~ _

_~~If you really met me… out there. You wouldn’t have liked me at all. I would have bored you.”~~ _

_~~“New York City. Metro General.”~~ _

“Hey, Peter?”

He paused, quickly turning on his heels. “Yes?”

“…I need you to arrange a trip to for me. …To New York.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> damn, this thing got out of hand pretty fast-


	3. Part III

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *if it isn't obvious... Tony still says "kid" a lot but Peter is much older now. 
> 
> Peter is 48. 
> 
> Christine is in her mid-30s (born later than original MCU timeline, much younger than Stephen. She's one of the few in this AU who's age I severely altered)
> 
> Tony's age, in reality, is 81. Stephen is in late 70s.  
> But in San Junipero, they basically can live, function, appear as however old they want. Just it's common most people chose to appear somewhere between 20-30 physically.

* * *

NYC, New York – Metro General Hospital

* * *

 _Earth  
_ _year: 2051_

_“Isn’t that Peter Parker? The guy who took over Stark Industries?”_

_“Wait… wait- that’s Tony Stark! The guy with the burn-”_

_“Tony Stark?”_

_“THE Tony Stark. Tony Stark of Stark Industries. The First Iron Man. The one who brought down Thanos!”_

_“Oh shi-“_

_“…How old is he now…?”_

_“In his 80s right?”_

He smiled to himself as Peter quickened his strides. And with it, speeding up the wheelchair he had been pushing, the one Tony was currently sitting in.

Quite frankly, the elder never really understood why the kid insisted on using his own labor. It wasn’t as if the chair couldn’t move on its own. But well, Tony learned the hard way as he became older and more tired, while Peter had gotten older and more ~~stubborn~~ self-assured, not to push on meaningless things. He would lose.

He tilted his head back just a tad, although it was impossible to get a good look at kid’s expression still. “Embarrassed to be seen with your old man?” he said teasingly, just loud enough for the younger to hear.

There was slight laughter in the tone that has Peter smiling.

“Sorry…” he muttered a bit sheepishly. “…Attention still makes me uncomfortable-“

Tony simply reached over to pat the other’s hand, giving a soft hum.

“I’ll try to grab someone-“

But just as Peter started looking around, someone was already approaching them.

A doctor, judging by her attire. Average height, somewhere in the mid-30s, caramel-colored hair that was loosely tied back, and very kind eyes.

“…Tony-…” her voice trailed off as if she was talking more to herself than at them. Then, soon enough, a smile started to form on her lips. She was quite beautiful when she smiled. “… _Tony_ … Stark.”

“Yep. One and only.” He smiled pleasantly back.

“I-…” she let out a short laugh as she extended her hand. “I’m sorry… I just realized when Stephen said _Tony-_ … Anyways, it’s a pleasure to meet you. My name is Christine Palmer-”

That snapped Tony’s full attention. “ _You’re_ Christine?”

“Yes..." she said still smiling. "Yes, I am.”

“Holy shit…”

It would be a lie to say Tony hadn’t wondered just how impressive a girl had to be doing Stephen _a favor_ by marrying him but… Yep. This should do it.

Young, beautiful, accomplished, charming… He suddenly felt a bit self-conscious.

Then, a worry came knocking, one that probably should have occurred to him a lot sooner. And with it, bewilderment at the whole situation.

“…I …shit- …You knew I was coming here…?” Tony tried hard to wrap his head around the idea but things were starting to not make any sense. It felt like he was missing one key puzzle to the whole picture. But before he could stop himself, and he would later blame it on his own old age, he blurted out, “I- …I slept with your fiancé-”

_“You did what?!”_ came Peter’s exasperation right behind him.

But before Tony could respond, Christine was already darting forward. “OH no no-!”

“No?” Tony frowned, genuinely confused. “So you’re not marrying him…?

“Well, yes- …I mean-…” The doctor glanced around, realizing they were starting to attract a fair amount of onlookers after that exclamation. “Why don’t you come with me,” she said with a smile. “We can talk on the way.”

* * *

“He’s been waiting for you,” she said with a cheery smile. But there is a spec of sadness in the voice.

He hardly hears her, however. Still trying to process…

“I mean- …he said you _might_ visit but… I think he just trying not to sound too hopeful. He can be stubbornly prideful-”

Stephen was apparently 21 when he drove his car off a cliff. Just at the age of starting his adult life. He was driving recklessly after a particularly nasty fight with his parents over his coming out. They didn’t want a gay son. Small town, Christine had explained, his family was old money, old-fashioned, big-time religious too. Tony amused bitterly that’d explain his behavior when they first met. The contradicting mannerisms, the curiosity, the uneasiness, the hesitation…

Christine led them to a small private room. It was clean, well kept, although mostly empty. A room that hardly had regular visitors, Tony notes.

“…He won’t be able to physically respond in any way… but he can hear you-”

It was a miracle that he even survived the accident. Or perhaps it really wasn’t. The crash had caused Stephen to be completely paralyzed. For decades been held captive in his own non-functioning body. Alive. But not really living.

The first thing Tony notice is the bed at the center. A man lay there, unmoving. He could hear the soft beep of the monitor, the percussive rise and fall of the mechanical ventilators.

Peter silently pushed the wheelchair closer, till Tony could see Stephen’s face. Definitely no longer a teen. And much older than the look he had been wearing in San Junipero. But if Tony had to take a guess, still possibly a handful of years younger than himself. And still quite handsome even with old age.

Even Stephen’s family stopped visiting years ago. Yet, none of them are willing to give consent to euthanasia. And they certainly don’t believe in the San Junipero technology. Wasn’t willing to pay for the subscription either. Stephen only managed his spot from a crowd-sourcing campaign organized by Christine. She apparently grew rather fond of him after a few years of talking through a com-box linked to comatose patients. Surprisingly, it took longer than she thought to get Stephen onboard to even trying the system. But recently, she said, that’s the only thing he’s looking forward to each week.

From across the room, Christine smiles at him. Tony tried to return it but couldn’t find the heart. He tries harder when he turned to face Stephen. But somewhat grateful the other couldn’t see him right then. Eyes closed, appearing unconscious even if he wasn’t really.

But he misses the beautiful stormy gaze. The impossibly soothing baritone, the clever laugh.

Tony leaned over slowly, pressing a kiss to Stephen’s forehead.

“Hey,” he whispered softly. “Missed me? …I know you did. Christine ratted you out.” He let out a soft huff of a laugh, reaching for Stephen’s hand and giving a light squeeze. “And you said you didn’t want me to visit…”

* * *

“So he’s been like that for more than forty years. …It’s basically a whole lifetime.”

“And that’s why this whole San Junipero system has been a big deal to him. The biggest deal. It’s a chance to live out a life.”

Peter insisted they should eat. Masking it in the excuse that _he_ needs to eat. _But my metabolism, Mr. Stark! Mr. Stark, are you going to let me starve?!_ The kid has always been a bit antsy about Tony’s terrible habit of skipping meals on a regular basis. It probably didn’t help that during this joint travel, Peter knew for a certainty the elder didn’t eat anything since the night prior.

The kid wandered off somewhere to order insisting Tony and Christine sit at a table and wait, to talk.

For a hospital cafeteria, it was incredibly nice. Spacious, comfortable seating area, a panoramic window on one side. The food looked great from what he saw others carrying.

Then it occurred to Tony… Right. He still had a standing donation to this hospital. And after during the prime years of the Avengers team continuously ending up at this hospital and someone always complaining about the food… he pettily made them sign an agreement that some of his donations would specifically go towards the food.

“Like I said he was hesitant. Said he didn’t want to be so attached to something fake,” Christine went on. “But he seems to love it there now. He never sounded so happy before. …I don’t think he really knows who you are… who Tony Stark is… that you designed the system itself. I actually followed the project since the beginning. Back when it was at the first of its stages. Binarily Augmented Retro-Framing-" 

"B.A.R.F."

She laughed. "You always had terrible naming-" 

Tony flashed her a smile.

After a pause, Christine continued, the smile lingering. "…When he said _Tony_ I had no idea…”

“Well," he said with a short sigh. "...common for people ditch the last name there. It can be a fresh start for some. Not necessarily tied to the life or responsibilities from here. And I probably look different there than how most of the world remembers me by… not that he would even know that I suppose…”

“I'm sure he would be thrilled. Half of the system here… the technologies helping him was created by you-“

“Well, clearly not enough.” It came out sharp. Before he could stop himself. The guilt he had been mulling over since he heard about Stephen’s condition…

How did he miss that? When signed off on the restrictions that will be placed for the San Junipero system… He even purposely left in the loophole for Cap. How did he not think further?

They could have created exceptions to age constraints for those in extreme conditions completely. Could have built more funding for those who couldn’t afford it, make it more accessible. Looked into more of the laws that would play like euthanasia restrictions… He was supposed to be a genius. How did it slip by him?

_~~He fought with Pepper a lot that year. After she said she didn’t-… There was so much anger, disappointment, fear. Distraction.~~ _

“I’m sorry…” He cleared his throat, glancing at Christine. “I didn’t mean to snap-“

Although luckily, she didn’t seem bothered, giving an understanding smile. “It really is fine.”

Tony let his eyes wander for a moment. To Peter who he could see at the line in the distance, the simple décor along the walls. But he hardly really saw them. Not really.

“So… he really wants to completely pass over? Pass over completely to San Junipero full time?” he asked in a softer tone. “Even though he barely tried a couple weeks of it? …If he does that it’ll be permanent. He won’t be able to undo it…”

“Can you blame him? For now, he’s confined to the five-hour weekly limit…”

“It... it came out during trial studies. Some go crazy if they spend too much time in it. Don’t want to live in this world anymore. Disassociate your body from your mind-“

“Yes but… he’s already disassociated from his body…”

“Yeah. …Right.” Tony turned his gaze back to the doctor, pausing. Soon a tiny smirk playing at the corner of his lips. “So… this marriage…?”

Christine let out a short nervous laugh, shaking her head slightly. “State’s got a triple-lock on euthanasia cases. You got to have a sign off from the doctor, the patient, and a family member. Stops people passing over _just_ because they prefer San Junipero. …Obviously, Stephen’s family is not on board…”

“But a spouse can override that.” He finished for her. “Hence the wedding bells.”

“A pastor is coming tomorrow AM. And Stephen’s scheduled to pass tomorrow afternoon…”

Tony let out a huff. “Schedule to pass,” he repeats, more to himself. “Let’s just call it dying.”

She gave him a look. “If you can call it dying-“

“Uploaded to the cloud,” he went on, a bit sarcastic. “Sounds like heaven.”

That made her frown, just a bit, staring at him now with confusion. “You know it’s more than that… It’s just as real as this world. …It was your creation.”

No answer came. Tony simply lowered his gaze to the table, tapping his fingers onto the surface absentmindedly.

It was a long while till he spoke again. “Are you going to dress up?”

  
  
“Ceremony is during my coffee break,” she admitted with a smile. “…I never married so I figured… what’s the harm?”

“Can’t imagine why. I would think suitors would be lining up for you-“

“I… work a lot…”

“You’re a good person, Christine,” he couldn’t help but say. And he means it.

“Least I can do, right?”

Tony stared at her, thinking. Then…

“Do you think you can hook us up to the system now? Just for a little while? Before he passes?”

She tilted her head. “You would still be able to see him afterward. I mean… then he’d be no limits. Permanent residence of San Junipero-“

“I know, I know- …But…” He tried his best at a charming smile, leaning in a little. “Could you?”

There was hesitation but, “They are really tight on the regulations-"

“Tell them it’s for Tony Stark. If you have any trouble, tell them to take it up with me.” A thought occurred to him that it has been a very long while since he was willing to throw his name around. Then he added in a cheery tone. “And it’s the night before his wedding! That’s a special occasion.”

“I-…Okay,” Christine said with a huff of a laugh. “Just for a bit…”

* * *

Tony sat still, his eyes fixed on Stephen’s motionless form.

Peter was kneeling next to him, pulling out a small coin-like device from a white box. Then, placed the connector to Tony’s temple, straightened up, watching as Christine did the same for Stephen.

“Keep watch?” Christine motioned to the door.

Peter nodded, quickly crossing the room.

And the doctor turned her attention to Tony. “I can only give you about five minutes…”

“Thank you,” Tony smiled, leaning back in his wheelchair.

Christine picked up the control that she left on the bed.

* * *

Tony’s lakeside cabin

* * *

 _San Junipero  
_ _simulation year: 1987_

Quiet.

It was quiet.

Calm, peaceful, warm.

Sunlight was bleeding in from the window. The faint smell of pine lingering.

He flexed his right hand. The pain was gone. 

Soon, his eyes landed on the mirror next to the main doorway. The reflection devoid of gray hairs, the endless fine line and wrinkles. No burn, no scars marking the right side of his face. Just clear, sun-kissed skin, clean-shaven, full dark chestnut hair that was a bit windswept.

He ran his fingers through it, trying to manage it a little as he pushed the door open, sprinting out.

It doesn’t take long for Tony to find him. The other appeared to have been by the lake, staring at the water.

“HEY!”

Stephen turned hastily, looking a bit confused but immediately relieved when his gaze fell on the approaching brunette. “It’s… daylight. I’ve never been here in the daylight. …What’s going on?”

“Come here, we don’t have much time-“

Before Stephen could press on the matter, Tony already had his hands on him. His mind immediately stopped racing.

Tony smiled, the pads of his thumb tracing Stephen’s sharp cheekbones, stopping just under the distinct grey-blue. His heart sighed in relief. A breath he didn’t even know he was holding. Possibly since he laid eyes on Stephen’s lifeless form.

“So I had a talk with Christine-…”

“...O-oh…”

“You’re passing over tomorrow.” It was a statement, not a question.

“Couple hours after the wedding…” The smile Stephen had been wearing started to crumble, soon averting his gaze completely. “…I meant to tell you-… I was going to tell you… No, I wasn’t. But… I should have, I know-“

“Hey. Hey…” Tony reached up, both his hands at either side of the other’s face, trying to coax the other to look at him. “It’s okay…”

For a moment they stood still, eyes locked, fingers eventually entwined.

Then, with another deep breath in, “I’m… going to say something crazy…” And with that, Tony firmed his grip on Stephen’s hand, sinking to one knee.

“Wanna marry me instead?”

Stephen stared, obviously stunned. A small frown starting to form, mouth slightly a gasp.

“Look… Christine seems great,” the brunette started in a ramble. “…You’re right. She’s amazing. …But unless I completely misunderstood this… why not marry someone you’ve had a… connection with? Even if it hasn’t been that long-“

He stopped. Stopped because the next second, Stephen dropped down in front of him, his lips sealing over Tony’s.

When they pulled back, there was laughter. Warm as the sun over them, clear as the blue sky. Perfect.

Happy.

Stephen looked so happy.

“So… is that a yes?”

A nod. Just a very enthusiastic nod.

Tony felt himself smiling just watching.

This felt right. Stephen deserved to be happy. Deserved everything. Deserved to marry someone he ~~loves~~ has feelings for even if was just to pass over.

It’s the least Tony can do.

And maybe… just maybe…

* * *

NYC, New York – Metro General Hospital

* * *

 _Earth  
_ _year: 2051_

The following day, a pastor is reading the words of marriage ceremony. Tony sat beside Stephen on the hospital bed, holding his wrinkled hand. Peter standing not too far away, next to Christine, both beaming.

Tony never imagined he would marry, let alone marry again.

It comes back to him. The day long ago. Bright spring day in Malibu. After so much tragedy, it was the first day, their first step towards the next chapter, for hope.

The perfect wedding. She was beautiful in the long ivory gown.

Part of him is still there with her.

_“…To be your lawfully wedded husband, to have and to hold, in sickness and in health, in good times and woe, for richer or poorer…”_

He thought it would feel wrong. To be here again with another.

But it doesn’t.

It really doesn’t.

* * *

Christine signs first. As Stephen’s official doctor for the record.

Then the tablet is passed to him. Tony scans it quickly before tapping the consent box for “spouse”.

They look around at all in the room, before giving a nod to Christine.

She held the syringe with a steady hand, giving one last glance towards Tony.

He goes back to stroking Stephen’s hair.

Peter subtly turns away last minute, facing the wall.

When the doctor presses the syringe, an opaque white fluid travels through the tube connected to Stephen. The small disk attached to his temple flashes bright blue.

The screen displaying the vital signs eventually flattens.

Christine draws the white sheet over Stephen’s face.

* * *

Tony’s lakeside cabin

* * *

 _San Junipero  
_ _simulation year: 1987_

Stephen steps out to the dock, the wood creaking softly beneath him. One step, after another. A leisure pace he didn’t even know he was capable.

He had all the time in the world.

All the time to admire the rippling water, stare into the low hanging clouds, enjoy the smell of fresh pine… watch the leaf turned gold.

The sun was warm against his skin. So warm and inviting.

It felt real. Everything felt so real. Down to the crisp air filling his lungs, the distant chirping of birds.

He felt alive. So alive.

He let his eyes fall closed, took a deep breath in, letting it out…

A sigh of relief.

He was alive.

* * *

[following day…]

* * *

 _San Junipero  
_ _simulation year: 1987_

Stephen had been out for a walk when he hears it. The loud roaring of the engine as it came closer and closer. So dramatic it couldn't possibly be anyone else.

Perhaps he should have been more aware of the time but quite frankly, he had deliberately been trying not to stare at the clock too much the whole day. He didn’t want to be hanging onto every tick waiting for the usual visiting hours of San Junipero to start.

It was a tad bit too desperate.

And yet he turned around embarrassingly fast as he heard the familiar cheery voice.

“HEY!”

Tony was waving wildly at him, practically hanging out of the red 1987 jeep he pulled up in.

Stephen let out a laugh, narrowing his eyes a bit as he stared at the enlarged white bow at the front of the car, the stringed cans tied at the back, the back window painted with white letters of _Just Married_. And Tony… Tony was wearing a tux. A stunning, well-fitted, white tux. The light fabric complimenting his tanned skin, highlighting the dark feature… especially a goatee he was now sporting. That was new.

It was a look Stephen saw in some of Tony’s photos in the cabin walls, although Tony did look significantly older in those. Today, in front of him, the brunette didn’t look much older than late 20s as usual. But the facial hair did make him look slightly more mature he had to admit. It oddly suited him.

“What?”

That snapped Stephen away from his amusing.

Tony was throwing his hand up in a mock offense. “You didn’t dress up to see me?”

He merely shook his head, laughter easily falling from his lips. “I uh…” he thought for a moment. The next, Stephen was in a simple black tux. “Better?”

Tony let out a whistle, giving an exaggerated look up and down. Then, jumped off from the car, soon wrapping his arms around Stephen’s neck pulling them closer.

“God you look _amazing_ -“

Stephen let out an exasperated huff. As if he didn’t believe in the words, as if he didn’t feel flustered.

Tony smirked as he quickly pressed in for a kiss. Tony always kissed with purpose. And today seemed to be to take his breath away.

“I love a man who can pull of a good tux-“ he continued to tease, running a firm hand over the other’s chest.

Stephen smiled, nibbling lightly at the brunette’s bottom lips before slightly pulling back. “Stop it,” he warned, although his tone was far from being serious.

Tony laughed warmly at that. With one more quirked smile, he stepped back, a bounce to his step. “SO! …Here’s what I’m thinking. How about a scenic drive up to the hills, romantic evening under the stars, maybe back here for fireplace and the _obvious…_ honeymoon… activities-“

He didn’t get far before he was pulled back closer. Stephen’s firm grip at his wrist, the other arm soon around his waist.

“Sounds perfect.“

* * *

“…Looks so real.”

The jeep was parked in an isolated clearing. Far enough to be a safe distance away from the cliff but near enough to have a good view overlooking the hills, the lake below, the city light in the far distance.

The two lay at the hood of the car, side by side, looking up into the million glistening stars above.

“Feels so real…” Stephen muttered, absentminded traced over the cold metal. Then just as suddenly he shot up to a sitting position.

Tony turned to him questioningly but the other simply gave him a quick kiss, a wide grin, before jumping off from the car.

The brunette let out a soft chuckle, amused at the apparent high Stephen seemed to be in for whatever reason. “What are you doing?”

“UGH! I love it! I just-… I love it here-“

“You’ve been here before.”

“Yes but now I _live_ here,” he emphasized. Then spun back around, standing right up against Tony. His hand placed on either side of the brunette still sitting on the hood. “Be with me.”

Tony smiled, fingers sweeping away the loose strands of hair from Stephen's eyes. “…I’m with you now-”

“That’s not what I mean,” he quickly retorted. “…and you know it.” He reached for Tony’s hand, intertwining their fingers. “Pass over. When you are ready. When it’s your time… I can wait-“

“Stephen-“ He closed his eyes, grimacing.

“Stay here. With me. Please-“

“Can we just enjoy this-“

“I can make you happy,” He placed a kiss at the palm of Tony’s hand before clutching it closer to his chest. “I know I can. Just be with me. I… I love you. I honestly do-”

Slight shaking of the head. Tony gently tugged his hand away. “Let’s just be in the now… I don’t-“

“It only two hours till midnight-“

A short pause then…

Tony leaned in a little closer, licking his lips. Taking a different approach. “We should get back then,” he said, smiling sweetly once more. “…And I swear, I’ll make it worth your while, handsome. You know how good I can be… Anything you want tonight, honey… however you want me-“

Stephen glanced away. He never minded Tony being like this before. The suggestive remarks, the bold come-ons. But right then, it felt cheap. Left a bad taste in his mouth. As if the other was whoring himself just to get out of a difficult conversation. As if the brunette thought he, Stephen, would be willing for that trade.

“I want all of you.” He said as they next locked eyes. “…It's only two hours till midnight. Then you’re out of here and I have to wait another week to see you again…”

Tony definitely appeared frustrated now, his voice taking on an edge. “You knew… You _know_ I’m just a visitor.”

“For how long? Couple months? Five hours a week for a month or two? Then what?”

“We’re... We're not doing this-“

“Then you’ll be gone. Just _gone_. …You could have forever, Tony. We can have forever!”

“Forever.” He let out a scoff. “Who can even make sense of forever…”

“Well… for however long you want then! And if you change your mind, then you can remove yourself just like that-“ Stephen snapped his fingers. “It’s not a trap… You’re not going to be stuck here if you don’t want to anymore- Just... give it a chance! Give us a chance-“

“I’m going.” With that, Tony gave a light shove to Stephen's chest. Creating enough distance for him to jump off from the car, walking away.

And Stephen automatically reached for him. His fingers locking onto the other’s wrist. “Tony-… Tony! Tony…” His voice was starting to take on a more desperate tone. “It’s real,” he said softly as he motioned between them. “This is real. …And this…” He lifted their hand, the simple gold wedding band glistening against the dark. “This is real.”

Tony didn’t even look. Seemed to be avoiding it. “…You know that was a gesture.”

“You married me-“

“To help you pass over. …As… as a kindness-“

That caught him off guard. “It’s not so kind to leave.”

Perhaps it was the tone, or the very obvious expression in his eyes, Tony only took one swift glance before yanking away. With a hardened look, he swiftly walked to the driver’s side.

Stephen quickly followed. Pushing shut the door that Tony had just barely opened. “Hey… Hey, Tony! Look, I… I’m sorry. I’m sorry! Okay? … But I’ve got this chance… I want to share it with you. I want you to at least give this _a chance_ -“

“I said I made my choice.”

“I know you love me.” Stephen reached for him, his hands settling at Tony’s hips. “Or at least... feel something for me. You can’t possibly tell me you would have traveled to the other side of the country, just up and married anyone you slept around with here just out of kindness! …There is something here! You know it.”

Tony pursed his lips. No longer willing to meet his eyes.

Stephen felt confused. Honestly confused. “What is this? …Why are you doing this?”

“Don’t,” he tried to cut him off, bitterness etched clear. But there was something else there. Something that was hard to place. “Just fucking don’t-”

“What? You feel bad? Is that it?” Stephen thought for a moment. Back to their conversations, back to everything said, the hints whispered throughout the cabin. “…Because of your wife? Because she isn’t here?” Selfishly, and perhaps a bit unreasonably, he feels a shot of jealousy. One that makes his fingers tighten.

“Don’t-”

“Well, that was HER choice. She CHOSE to turn this down!”

“STOP-“

“She left you! She could have passed over here but no, she left you!”

“You don’t know what you are saying!”

“You should be mad at her not whipping yourself with guilt- Making the choice to follow her when you don’t even believe it’s the right one! …You can’t even see it. What she did… it was selfish actually-“

Slap.

Stephen didn’t exactly expect it.

His face instantly snapping to the right upon impact. It stopped his ramblings. Blinking quickly as he pursed his lips, running his fingers over his cheek where Tony had just struck him. Not with full force, but enough to sting.

“Twenty-nine years.”

There was an edge to that tone. Tony’s voice started leveled but just barely. He was literally shaking with anger. This time, staring straight into the other’s grey eyes when they were flickered back.

“…I was with her for _twenty-nine years_. You can’t begin to _imagine_. You can’t _know_. The bond. The commitment. The boredom. The yearning. The laughter. The love of it. THE FUCKING LOVE! …You just can’t _know_. Everything we sacrificed. The years I gave her, the years she gave me. Did you think to ask? Did it occur you to ask…?”

The other stood there, a bit stunned. He’s never seen Tony like this. Even when the brunette was angered he never acted this emotional. “…I-…”

But Tony cut him off. “We had a daughter. Morgan. Always difficult, always beautiful. Died when she was just fourteen. And Pepper and I… we felt that heartbreak as one."

He was breathing hard, gasping. Stephen wanted to hold him, extending a hand. But Tony backed away instantly. 

"…You think you’re the only person who ever suffered, go fuck yourself.”

“Tony… Tony I didn’t know-…”

“You didn’t think to! ...You know when she was dying what Pep said to me? When she was offered this? To pass over? To pass through, serve eternity in this fucking graveyard you’re so in love with! …She said how can I? When Morgan missed out, how can I? …So she went.”

His eyes stung, his cheeks felt wet. Realizing he started crying without meaning to, Tony wiped away the tears angrily. “And I wish… I can say I believe she’s with her now. They’re together but I don’t! Okay?! I believe they are fucking nowhere! Like you said… Gone. Just fucking gone.”

“Tony…”

Stephen stepped closer, trying to grab a hold of him. Tony slapped the hand away.

“No I pitied you!” he yelled, swallowing away the guilt. Pressing down the still sane part of his mind yelling at him that it was a lie. “And that’s the truth.”

~~No. It wasn’t.~~

“I pitied you. And now you give me some sales pitch about how fucking peachy _forever_ could be? One that I _created_ -“

“What-…?”

“You want to spend forever somewhere nothing matters? End up like all those… fucks at the Sakaar? Trying desperately to feel something? Anything? Go ahead. But I’m out.”

“Tony! ...Tony, I’m sorry!”

But it was too late. Tony already hastily stepped into the car, slamming the door. Without even so much as a glance, he shifted gears, pressing the gas.

“TONY!”

Soon the screeching of tires, the roar of the engine. He didn’t even know where he was going. Could hardly make out the road through the tears.

He was already pushing 60 but not letting up. It was too slow. These old cars were always too slow. He wanted faster. Faster than his heart. Fast like when he was up in the air. In the suit. _His suit_. Where he could forget. Leave everything behind on the ground.

He doesn’t want to think about it. Doesn’t want to unpack what had just happened. It was supposed to be that he didn’t have to. He wasn’t supposed to have to do any of this anymore.

_This was supposed to be fun._

The conversation. The guilt. The shame.

~~The love.~~

_That was not fun._

He slammed down on the gas. 70. 80.

Not enough. Not even close.

There is anger. He feels it. But there is also an emptiness that trails with it.

Just like this stupid life.

What did he know. What did Stephen know about love. Stupidly throwing the word around as if he could possibly understand the gravity of it.

At the corner of his eyes, he sees his pain meter. Turning it up to 100.

Better yet how can he possibly think he is in love with him? Tony.

Tony Fucking Stark.

He didn’t know anything. Didn’t even know who he is. What he’s done. Everything he’s screwed up. Every mistake, every downfall, every struggle, every remorse. Everything that makes him who he is.

How do you love someone you don’t even know.

He wants to scream. Scream till his lungs give.

There’s a roadblock up ahead.

He doesn’t hit the brakes.

A crash, the horrible screeching of the tires.

He doesn’t scream. Doesn’t have the time.

* * *

Malibu, California – Stark Mansion

* * *

 _Earth  
_ _year: 2051_

He awoke with a start, gasping for breath. Gasping for breath that was just barely out of reach.

The pain. The excruciating pain.

It wasn’t real. But he couldn’t separate what was in his head from what was real.

He reached up, harshly tugging off the connector at his temple, throwing it aside. Trying to pull himself from the bed but barely managing.

“…TONY!”

_Peter?_

“…Tony! ...TONY!”

Tony forced himself to turn, instinct telling him to follow the voice.

No. That wasn’t Peter...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> woop. sorry - extending this to have one more chapter. 
> 
> I probably could have just wrote the end with this one but I needed to post something now or felt like I would never do it lol ...plus adding a bit more details about MCU verse into this world so... need more words.
> 
> Is it weird that this is kinda my favorite thing to write even tho its least hit/kudo etc lolol


	4. Part IV

* * *

Malibu, California – Stark Mansion

* * *

 _Earth  
_ _year: 2051_

“I’m actually kind of hurt-”

“Look, Steve… I’m sorry. I know what I said to you not long ago but-“

Tony let out a sigh, leaning further back onto the soft pillows, turning his gaze upward for a moment.

What was the best way to sort this situation out? Because quite frankly the billionaire didn’t exactly have an explanation of why he went from declaring he cannot do love ever again to marrying someone in a span of few short weeks.

But oddly enough, Steve let out a laugh. A laugh that was warm, earnest. A laugh Tony had grown so accustomed to in their decades of friendship.

The blonde glanced behind him to where Tony sat. Till then he had been rummaging for Tony’s meds and returning with it along with a glass of water.

“Oh. No, not that.” With a smile, he took a seat on the bed next to Tony, helping him lift the cup slowly to his lips. “I mean, sure, it caught me- ...off guard and I was...” His voice trailed off for a moment. There was a shrug, a scrunching of the face. “What I’m trying to say is… I’m glad I tried. I gave my best effort in... pursuing you. And now I have no regrets. It just wasn’t meant to be. And I can accept that.”

Tony continued to stare, wasn’t sure if he could look away even if he wanted to.

“I’m still your friend. And I’m happy for you, Tony. You know that…” Steve continued. With full sincerity only Captain America could deliver so convincingly. “Ultimately, I’m happy you found someone that makes you… happy.”

Tony let out a soft hum. A short nod as his posture relaxed.

“But- …You know,” there was a certain amount of sarcasm now. The smile was dropped but the tone remained playful. “I really thought… I would actually be invited to the wedding this time. If you had another one. I mean, I get the first one but- …After everything we went through, Tony-“

The brunette chuckled, shaking his head a bit. “It was very last minute... VERY last minute.”

“I would have made a GREAT best man."

“Rhodey-bear would have resented you-“

“I’d risk it.”

Tony raised an eyebrow.

And Steve pulled a face, as if contemplating hard. “…I would… have- set my pain meter to zero next time I ran into him in San Junipero.”

It didn’t take long till laughter filled the room. Mixing in with the sound of the crashing waves at the distance, the buzzing of the wind, and occasional soft croaking of the seagulls flying by.

“Hey. …here-" A grin and Tony shifted his weight, scooting over to one side of the bed to make room. He nudged for Steve to follow. “Come on- get comfortable…“

He caved, easily.

Another huff of laughter and the blonde slipped off his shoes, soon situating himself fully on the bed. Tony automatically nudged closer, leaning his head against Steve’s chest. Almost instinctively, Steve put an arm around the other supporting his weight.

And they sat there silent for a while. Side-by-side, leaning against the mountain of pillows and each other.

“So…” Tony said eventually. Taking a deep breath in, then out. “…Why are you here? Don’t you have some catastrophe to save the world from?”

Because that was the thing, wasn’t it? It had been a long while since they enjoyed each other’s company like this. Long since they saw each other face-to-face in this world. And there was reason for it.

Unlike Tony, Steve looked just as young as he did when Avengers first formed. Still in prime physical condition. Tall, perfect physique, skin still young and vibrant, sun-kissed golden hair. To the point, when Tony woke up a couple of hours ago and his eyes landed on Steve, for a second he couldn’t tell if he was still in San Junipero or not.

Steve was still Captain America. Sure the title had passed around from time to time but Steve himself never stopped being a hero. Never had to.

Unlike Tony, he didn’t need to retire.

But perhaps that was a curse in itself.

“Just dropping by-…” the blonde shrugged. “I missed the weather here…”

“…Peter asked you to babysit while he stayed in New York, huh?"

“…He was worried.”

“I’m fine, Cap.”

“Are you?” Steve leaned away, just enough to meet Tony’s eyes. “Because I just found you last night on the floor of the bedroom, curled up in pain-“

“I…” Tony darted his gaze. “…It’s... complicated.”

For a moment, Cap appeared as if he wanted to argue, was about to press for an explanation. But perhaps it was due to too many years of experience or perhaps because right now, they can both use a break, with a small sigh he leaned back to their original position.

“Well…” he said softly, trying for small talk. “Buck says hi, by the way. Said we should all hang out at some point in San Junipero-“

Tony smiled, “…Sure. …How is he?”

“Uh… not great-… here, in this world anyway. ...He’ll be passing over soon…”

He let those words sink in.

Unlike the Super Soldier serum used on Steve, Hydra’s version used on Bucky had been much less effective. And unlike Steve, Bucky actually had been aging at a relatively normal rate. Steve wore a brave front but the past few years, it was obvious the thought of losing his best friend too, really losing him this time, was taking a toll on the Captain.

But Tony had been told couple months back that Bucky finally accepting his offer to try the San Junipero system. Though Steve had mentioned during one of their previous run-ins that his best friend still had not yet decided if he wanted to fully pass over or not.

“So… he decided. You must be over the moon-”

“Yeah- of course. I mean, I know… it’s completely his decision. But well, I won’t lie… I would have been sad if he chose to… you know… leave completely. But he says someone has to keep me out of trouble still.” He chuckled, fondly. “…It’s good. I wasn’t sure I can lose anymore friend so-“

Tony actually felt his heart drop. He stayed still for another second or two, trying to calm himself. Then eventually, let out a sigh, “I’m… sorry.”

Silence fell almost immediately. 

“You’re…” Steve's voice was still completely calm, however, “…still not going to pass over…?”

“… No.” Tony tried to clear his throat. “…That’s… what we fought about. Stephen and I. …His name is Stephen by the way…”

“Yeah. Yeah… Peter told me a bit. And I think we already ran into each other that one time-"

"...Oh. Right..."

Another pause. "…Sorry I just… assumed you were now… after you know… the wedding bells-”

“It was… It was just a gesture. So he can pass over-“

Silence. Tony could practically hear the gears turning in Steve’s head.

“…Then you should have just let him marry that doctor-“

Tony groaned. “I… I thought maybe it would be nice for him to at least marry someone he likes to a degree. You shouldn’t have to marry just to…” But his voice trailed off. He let out a deep sigh, groaning as he shut his eyes closed. “I don’t know, Steve. I don’t know what I was thinking-“

“Likes?” Steve repeated.

“He thinks he’s in love with me.”

“He _thinks_ he’s in love with you…?”

“Steve-“ Tony tried to shift away completely, so they can be face-to-face. But he found it to be a much more difficult task than he thought. His body felt heavy, refusing to support itself.

Immediately, however, the blonde was already nudging him to lean back against the pillows. Moving himself instead so he’s sitting in front of the other, a bit away. Tony murmured begrudged thanks as Steve smiled.

“…He doesn’t know me, Steve,” Tony went on. “…He thinks he’s in love with me but… he doesn’t even know me.”

“What? That you’re Tony Stark? We both know half of that was a front you put out for the world. Does it matter that he doesn’t know?”

“…Not that part.”

“Tony…” Steve had on a look that Tony really should be used to by now. It was the same look Cap always gave him whenever he did something stupidly reckless in the field or was a bit too liberal with his self deprecating jokes. “…there is more to you than being Iron Man.”

Tony darted his gaze away. “That’s the only good side of me.”

“That’s not true-“

“That’s the only good thing I did for this world. Being _the Savior_.” He let out a huff, running a hand over his face, feeling the scarred skin against his fingers. He could practically feel the heat rising to his neck. “…After helping for years to ruin it. Gave the world more weapons to escalate wars. Blind to it by being distracted by my own selfishness, ignorance, and endless amounts of self-pity… He doesn’t even know about any of that. He wasn’t even given the chance to choose for himself, determine if that’s something he can accept. Being Iron Man… that was my saving grace. Atonement for my sins. He doesn’t know that. Let alone what sins I was paying for. …How is that love, Steve? How can you say its love when you don’t even know what… monster… you’re loving. That’s just… delusional.”

“Tony…,” Steve started evenly. His hand found their way to Tony’s shoulder, giving it a firm squeeze. “You are… someone who married this guy to help him pass over. Who… after realizing what he went through, is trying to change literally the world so no one else suffers like that again.”

Tony raised an eyebrow and Steve gave a tight smile. “…I heard from Peter you guys are reassessing the requirements for San Junipero and challenging the euthanasia laws.”

Tony let out a huff, trying to look away. But Steve doesn’t let him this time.

“…You-,” he continued, almost sternly. “…took care of the Avengers. You cared about every single one of them. You gave all of them a home, help when they needed it. You are… someone who always tries to be better. When faced with the fact you may have made a mistake, there is something wrong, you don’t shy away from it. You acknowledge it, You are brave enough to address it. You try to change. And you do change. The futurist. …You are brilliant, compassionate, bold, infuriatingly willful at times… That’s _you_. Not Iron Man. And I think… he sees that side of you and fell in love with you. You can’t say that’s not… _you_. Iron Man is a part of you. Always will be. And he should hear it. The full story. But that’s just a part of you. You’re so much more than that chapter of your life.”

For a long while, Tony sat still. Trying to wrap his head around all the emotions that had been building, that he had suppressed for so long. Millions of thoughts racing in his head, all competing to get ahead.

Another minute, however, Steve reached out for the other’s forearm, giving a light pull. It doesn’t take long before Tony leans his forehead against Steve’s shoulder. He tried to take deep breathes, trying to will down the sobs, trying to ignore the stinging in his eyes.

“…I-I don’t…” he swallowed, hard. “I’m… supposed to… What if-… What if she really is waiting for me… _They_ are-…”

“…Do you believe that?”

A long pause then, “…No.”

Steve silently ran a hand on Tony’s back, slow circles as if to try and soothe him.

“…But she was the love of my life, Steve.”

“Yea…” he replies in a whisper. “I know, Tony. I know. …But-… She’s… gone. They are…” There was a sudden break in his voice, a subtle but sudden stop of movement. “…And I’m so sorry for that-”

“…It’s not your fault.”

“…Is it?” That sounded odd.

Tony pulled himself back, although still holding onto the other for support. There was a newfound strength to his voice. “Steve-…”

But the other cuts in. “…You warned us. When we-… When I came knocking at your doorstep. At that cabin. You said you couldn’t roll the dice on your second chance and I pushed-“

“I still made that decision.”

“What if… if we didn’t make that decision then… things may have been different. …What if in that path, your daughter-“

“Cap,” Tony said firmly “Steve. …You don’t know that. I don’t know that. We don’t know that. The _what ifs_. …We can’t… we can’t do that. That’s… a rabbit hole.” He licked his lips, his throat suddenly felt too dry. “…I don’t… I don’t blame you. Morgan got sick. You didn’t cause that. That wasn’t your fault. …It wasn’t mine either. …It was tragic. Absolutely tore my soul. But… it wasn’t anyone’s fault. I made peace with that.”

Took a while, but eventually, Steve nods. Though looking off to the corner of the opposite wall.

Another second, then two, wordlessly Steve helped Tony back to a more comfortable position. After, laying down himself next to his former teammate.

Peaceful quiet followed. Both emotionally drained but there was also a genuine calmness that settled. Calmness to simply resting there, together. Because together, they were safe. It was comfortable. There was trust between them that only countless failures, trials, and decades of friendship could have formed.

“…Tony-”

“Hm?” came the whispered reply.

“…I think… they would have wanted you to be happy. If they saw-… even a chance for you to be happy again… I think they would have wanted you to take it.”

A brief pause.

“…She was the love of my life…”

“…Yeah. …But who says there can’t be more than one in a lifetime?”

“No.”

Steve craned his neck to one side, trying to get a glimpse at Tony’s expression. “So what is he?”

“…I don’t know… I can’t… put a word...”

“Don’t you think… if you’re having this hard of time just walking away-… isn’t it worth giving it a shot?”

They stayed still, eyes locked. Tony had on an expression that Steve wasn’t sure what to make of. It was almost blank.

“...Do you think…” Tony finally said in a whisper. Almost as if it’s a secret, as if it was something that shouldn’t even be uttered out loud. “…It’s possible… for the love of your life and your soul mate to be different people?

“Is that what he is…? Your soul mate?”

* * *

Tony’s lakeside cabin

* * *

 _San Junipero  
_ _simulation year: 1987_

He found Stephen sitting on the patch of grass overlooking the lake. Leaning heavily on one elbow, occasionally picking up a stone nearby and throwing it carelessly into the water.

“Hi.”

If the situation wasn’t so serious, wasn’t so strained, Tony may have been amused at how Stephen scrambled to his feet, how utterly relieved the other looked when their eyes met.

Tony tried to smile. Smile at the fact Stephen still stayed at the cabin. Even after several weeks, he remained here during Saturday night. He could have gone anywhere. Finally went off an enjoyed the freedom he found.

He felt guilt. But also a tinge of happiness.

“You didn’t leave…”

  
  
“I-…“ His voice was even but there was an obvious flinch at the words. “…Did you want me to…?”

“No. no-“ Tony said quickly. “I just wasn’t sure you would… wait…”

“…I wasn’t sure if you would come back.”

_I did._ Tony wants to say.

Because if he was being completely honest, something told him he knew how this would play out. How this would all end… the minute he laid eyes on Stephen.

Since the first words exchanged, the first moment they kissed, the first time they laid together… he knew all his stubbornness would be useless. He could try to run as far as his legs would take him and somehow he’ll be led back here.

Because this is where he needed to be.

Because he knew… this is where he belonged.

Tony let out a sigh, shaking his head as he lowered his gaze briefly. “I… I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have left like that. Not when you couldn’t just… come find me or contact me and… be left in the unknown. That was cruel-“

And it was. That was the truth. And he knew it well.

He honestly expected anger from Stephen. Perhaps some yelling or even just outright hit him. But…

“I’m just… glad… to see you again.”

There was a brief silence in which Tony finally looked up. Only to realize just how distraught the other really appeared. Those pale gray eyes held a look that Tony never quite seen before. And he doesn't ever want to see it again.

“Stephen…” He said softly. Tony could only let out one shaky breath as he reached out, carefully trying to get a hold of Stephen’s shoulder.

But as soon as his fingertips touched, the taller nearly threw his weight onto him in a tight embrace.

Without much hesitation, Tony leaned his weight onto Stephen. Letting his eyes fall close, trying to focus on the warmth. He could feel Stephen tightening his hold, however, as if with each second that passed, in fear it’ll be over.

“God, I just… didn’t want that to be the end…” It was shaky. No longer even nor well-controlled. Something about it stabs at Tony’s heart as he listened. “…The last time we see each other. I-I’m sorry I pushed… Y-...You’re right. I-I… knew. I knew what you wanted. You were clear about your decision. I just thought about how short this would be, how soon I’ll lose you and I panicked-“

“I… thought just… maybe… maybe that… you changed your mind when you-” The word abruptly falters. Trailing off as Stephen took a deep breath. “…Actually never mind all that. It doesn’t matter now.” He forced a laugh, although a bit broken. “…I get it. I swear. I won’t bring it up again. Whatever you are willing to give me, I’ll take it. Whatever time there is left for us before you move on-…”

“…And that’ll be enough for you?”

_No._

“…Yes.”

Tony let out a sigh, stepping back slightly. Just enough so they can look at each other. Because there was a moment in which he felt the grip on his waist tighten. Tony stilled immediately. Trying to give a reassuring smile, trying to silently convey he’s not moving away completely.

“That’s a lie, Stephen,” he stated simply. “And you know it.”

Stephen opened his mouth, frowning, as if to argue. But then closes it just as quick, casting his gaze to the ground. “…It’s better than not having you at all. I… Tony… I love you… That’s one thing I’m sure about…”

“You hardly know me… You don’t know the things I’ve done-”

“But I do. I know who you are now. …I know you have a good heart. And I know you are always trying to be better.”

“…We all try. We don’t always succeed.”

For a moment they simply stood there, staring at one another.

Then a deep breath in, and out. “I-…“ Tony started softly. “…Stephen… I want you to have everything-“

Stephen was already shaking his head, coming to an assumption about what followed those words. “I don’t need _everything_ -“

But Tony put a hand to his shoulder, squeezing gently. “…I want to give you everything. I want to give you every part of me.” Then, after swallowing hard, a sad smile. “…I want to tell you… a story… from the beginning… or at least the beginning that matters…”

Silence.

And eventually, Stephen smiled. “…Well…” he said with a small laugh. “You have about four hours left.”

“No. …We have all the time in the world.”

...

The funeral is beautiful.

He doesn’t see it. He’s not there. But he knows it is.

They will carry his casket. Mahogany with gold trimming. Steve at the front left. Always at his left.

He will be wearing the pearl white suit that Pepper loved. Perfectly pressed, flawless, not even a spec of dust.

His friends would share kind words.

His teammates, the three from the original team that started it all, they will stand at the front. The other two will greet him as he passes over.

His body will be slowly lowered. With much dignity and respect. Buried between the two graves of his wife and child. Where he belongs.

There will be no tears. No sobbed goodbyes. 

Because they all know.

He’s not gone. 

He found happiness.

Again.

What lucky bastard finds that twice in one lifetime?

* * *

epilogue

* * *

 _San Junipero  
_ _simulation year: 2008_

They get into a rhythm of things.

Tony makes breakfast, Stephen makes lunch, dinner they play it by ear.

Stephen spends much of his days trying new hobbies, learning new skills, reading magazines and books about the world he missed out on. He rediscovers things he likes, finds out what he now dislikes. New things to love and new things to hate.

They go on hikes, take joyrides throughout the forest and the city. Some nights they visit famous restaurants, bars, clubs from every era. Some nights they stay in for a quiet meal and sitting out on the deck under the stars. It often ends with Stephen asking more questions about the Avengers, all the missions, the adventures, the crazy escapades and ridiculous stories of the team.

At first Tony tried to layoff on the inventing. He was supposed to be well retired and this world he’s currently in, doesn’t need saving. This world doesn’t need Iron Man.

He tried to tell himself that over and over again. 

But it started with tinkering with the machines around the cabin, then playing with the cars. Then before he knew it, he completely went over the cliff.

He would have been disappointed in himself if it weren’t for Stephen pointing out, why was he depriving himself in the first place? Inventing, exploring new ideas, that’s what made him happy. There was nothing wrong with that. This was supposed to be paradise so why was he trying to withhold himself from what brought him so much joy? Besides, he can now freely test the ideas from his later years that were never fully developed. He's now free from that old aging body and tired mind.

Occasionally, Stephen joins him in the workshop outback. Either reading a book on a couch that has been set up or helping Tony with his project as he learned himself little by little. And his dear husband, as Tony quickly found, was a very fast learner. Brilliant even. Amazing capacity to absorb information, connect complex concepts.

Frankly, Tony didn’t expect much initially. When Stephen asked what he had been working on he assumed it was out of politeness. But when the brunette explained and realized during their convo that the other was actually keeping up… He threw himself onto Stephen, kissing him, clawing at his clothes before the other can catch up on what was happening.

Tony wondered sometimes… how far that mind would have taken Stephen if he went onto higher education, tested those skills in the outside world.

It’s effortless, their life.

It’s never dull, never quite boring, but there is an underlining calmness and peace.

They should travel. That would have been the obvious thing they do.

That had been Tony’s intention originally. To show Stephen the world. After all, he built San Junipero to simulate every detail on Earth, every luxury, every wonders in the world.

And they do occasionally. But not nearly as much as Tony expected.

He wants to give Stephen everything.

He wants to give him the world.

Stephen never got the chance to live fully, see all the amazing spectacles, indulged in all the luxury the world had to offer. He fought so hard to be in San Junipero to _live_. To have _everything_. And Tony is determined to give it to him.

But what he doesn’t realize... is that for Stephen, this, their life together was already everything.

The ordinary and mundane can be the most precious thing with the one you love. The most wonderful thing this world, or any other, has to offer.

Everything else is just window-dressing.

* * *

They occasionally get visitors. They purposely stay put during Saturday nights just in case one of the tourist friends still wants to come by. Mainly Steve, Bruce, and on rare occasions, Thor. Everyone else Tony expects visits from has already either passed over, which means they can visit any time in the week, or has moved on.

But someone he never expected comes by one evening. Just before sunset. He and Stephen had been preparing dinner when his husband points out someone out by the lake.

“Hey…”

“Hello, Tony.”

Tony leisurely strode over, hands inside his pocket, the usual smirk in place. “Never thought I’ll see you again. Especially here.”

She smiled but doesn’t turn to him. Simply continued to watch the calm waves of water before them. “Just because I’m the Sorcerer Supreme doesn’t mean I’m averse to technology.”

As he stands next to her, he gave a quick glance to her appearance. Ancient One hadn’t changed from the last time they spoke years back. Quite frankly, she hasn’t changed at all. Still that ageless complexion, same serene look, dressed in many layers of golden fabric.

Towards the end of his life, he remembers envying her everlasting youth.

“So still the Sorcerer Supreme, huh?” Tony said with a small huff. He turned his gaze towards the lake as well, watching as the water burn red from reflecting the sunset. “What happened to that successor of yours? …Mondo…? Mordo, I think. …Is he ever going to get a turn?”

Corner of her lips curls but no answer came.

So he continued on. After all, he had a dinner to get to. “…What bring you by? Can’t imagine I’ll be useful to you anymore. Definitely retired now.”

“You confided in me once, you hated the thought of passing over to here.”

Tony shrugged. “Yeah well…” A pause. He shifted his weight, lowering his gaze for a brief moment. “… I guess I hated the thought of losing him more.”

But there was no reaction from her. It occurred to Tony then that she hadn’t actually asked in a question.

And when he looked up, he found her gaze somewhere, to a distance behind him. He followed it, landing on Stephen standing by the house. Stephen appeared be just observing. A bit of concern in that frown but seeming to have determined surveying from afar as satisfactory for now.

Tony huffed out a laugh, more to himself. _The protective idiot._ Even when they were literally in a world where there is no real danger.

“My husband…” he said to her in explanation. “…If you haven’t heard. Ste-“

“Stephen,” she finishes for him.

Tony frowned. “You know him?”

For a split second, there’s something in those emerald green. Something as she stared at Stephen. Something Tony couldn’t quite figure out. But it was more emotion than he had seen in her before no matter how stoic it still appeared. Regret? Disappointment? … Something sad though.

“Perhaps…” She turned to Tony with a smile. “…in another lifetime we may have.”

Tony let out a huff. He never liked her allusive way of talking. Too much vagueness and assumptions that could be made.

But for once she seemed to be giving more without him probing impatiently.

“I should have better protected him in this one. …And yet you still found him in the end.”

“You know I don’t like your riddles,” he retorted with a tight smile. This time, it bothers him more than he would like to admit. Because this time, he actually cares about the information. It's about his husband after all. “…And I don’t want to keep my husband waiting too long, we have plans. So come on. Spill-”

* * *

What Tony eventually realized is that Stephen is just as much of an addict as he is.

Someone who does everything to extremes.

This week, it has been drawing. He blames Steve.

“Oh wow-“ And he meant it as he looked over from Stephen’s shoulder.

But then again, why was he even getting shocked anymore. Stephen definitely had talents for many things. Mostly because he was either naturally good at somethings or fixated on it till he was.

He should be flattered, of course. It was very obvious what was sketched onto the heavy paper. Tall buildings, mayhem on the streets, a large circular ring in the air, an armor of red and gold…

It occurred to him he had just told Stephen about the Great War. About the spaceship appearing in New York, finally facing off Thanos. Finally meeting the Ancient One. Learning about how magic and sorcerers was actually a thing.

“…You’re good with your hands. Trying to be an artist now?”

_~~“What’s your job exactly? Except to make balloon animals?”~~ _

“Not really…” Stephen replied with a chuckle. “Just testing the waters as they say… Steve was trying to teach me the basics the other day. …Didn’t realize he was an artist-“

Tony smiled, pulling up a seat next to Stephen. “…Yeah. Well, that’s the part that gets overlooked a lot by the whole Captain America thing… then looking like the whole Greek god thing-“

Stephen turned to him, finally setting down the brush as he leaned back a little on the chair. A tight smile was stretched across his lips. “He’s _so_ pretty,“ he said in an exaggerated tone, laced with utter sarcasm.

Tony snorted out a laugh, shaking his head.

A thought briefly occurred to him there was once a time where he didn’t handle jealousy well from his lovers. Found them to be too annoying to deal with. But it was rather endearing from Stephen.

It probably helped the other never was outright unreasonable. It was always dowsed with a great amount of humor and never particularly too childish. In fact, Stephen had more tact, more intelligence, level of maturity than what seemed almost impossible for someone who had been trapped in his own body for more than forty years.

It was unnerving sometimes. Sometimes he felt like he was talking to someone who already experienced life a million times.

_~~“14,000,605.”~~ _

_~~How many did we win?”~~ _

Tony stood from his own seat, only to saddle the other’s lap, arms easily draping around his husband’s neck. “You know what he’s _not_?” he whispered with a wide grin. “Stephen Strange-Stark. Who I want a kiss from.”

Stephen smiled. This time, completely and utterly genuine.

Tony returned it with a stern look. “Right now.”

The other let out a short laugh before leaning in.

And they met in the middle, lips locking firmly, bodies pressing flush.

When they pull back, they are both still smiling.

“Hm… …You know... I did want to be a surgeon when I was younger. No point here is there? No sick people-“

Tony kept his eyes on the other, still smiling.

Though it slips for a split second.

He raised a hand, pad of his thumb lightly trailing along Stephen’s jawline.

“Hey,” he said almost in a whisper. “Can you… draw a man next to him? Tall, dark hair with a bit of silver at the temple… red cape.”

There is a pause. A pause in which Stephen simply stared.

“…Sure. …Are you going to tell me about him?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> & finally finished.
> 
> To be honest I'm not sure why I put so much effort into this fic because it has very low views but idk- I had weirdly a lot of fun with it and kinda liked how it turned out (and I rarely can say that about stuff I create 😂) 
> 
> So to the few who read & enjoyed, thank you ♡
> 
> love you 3000


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